Therapy is an incredibly useful tool for people who need a little help sorting and working through their feelings and mental health. It offers guidance and can teach some of the most valuable life skills and lessons. And when a bit of advice changes your life, you just have to share it with others.
That’s exactly what these people did when therapist Emily Anderson, LLMSW, from Rise Wellness Collaborative, asked TikTok users their most insane revelations they had in therapy. Scroll down to find them below, and be sure to upvote those that made you realize some useful things.
While you're at it, don't forget to check out a conversation with therapist Emily, who started this discussion in the first place and kindly agreed to tell us more about it.
#1
The more you think negatively the more your brain makes that your primary pathway. You’re conditioning yourself to think negatively. You have to PRACTICE positive thinking to form a new pathway.
Image credits: kdrake123
#2
Ppl who are upset when you set boundaries were benefiting from you having none
#3
My therapist told me one time that I don’t always have to be the bigger person.
Image credits: ✨🍒🍀
Therapist Emily Anderson, LLMSW, from Rise Wellness Collaborative, tells Bored Panda that what inspired her to ask such a question online was a mix of curiosity and admiration.
"As a therapist, I get to witness so many powerful moments in the room, the kind that stop people in their tracks and shift the way they see themselves or their lives. I thought, what would happen if we opened that question up to the internet? And the responses were incredible," she shares.
#4
My therapist likes to point out when my mother has joined the conversation.
Image credits: Aly
#5
Being an empath means as a child you were put in a position to manage and be hyperaware of other emotions and that was never your job.
Image credits: Jamila-San
#6
How about that chronic people pleasing is actually a form of manipulation.
Britt
People pleasing is just trying to control the emotions of others so you don't have to feel uncomfortable.
Image credits: FrannnnnyGlasss🍉
Anderson says that many clients come to revelations during their sessions, mostly related to a deep sense of shame.
"Shame for not enjoying parenthood the way they thought they should, for disliking their job, for not wanting a relationship with a family member, or for struggling in ways they believe they "should" be able to handle," she says.
"As we start to gently unpack those experiences and reduce the secrecy that surrounds shame, clients begin to feel more free to make value-driven choices that feel true to them. There is no "right" way to feel. Emotions are signals, and when we meet them with curiosity instead of judgment, we learn so much about ourselves, our story, and the past that shaped us."
#7
Anytime you feel angry, it’s probably another emotion. Anger puts you in control and feels safe, but you’re likely sad, anxious, neglected, etc. anger just feels better.
Image credits: alilann
#8
So much more than I thought stems from trauma. Even my values, for example, aren’t my own. They’re trauma responses. Like valuing stability, always making sure others feel seen/heard, always trying to not be bothersome, etc
#9
My therapist told me that I should consider that people may want to be around me just because they actually like me and not because of what I could do for them.
Image credits: freezerbrn
She has come to some revelations during therapy, too, which she kindly agreed to share with us.
"One of the biggest for me was realizing how much of my life had been shaped by doing 'the responsible thing.' I chose a science degree in undergrad, not because I loved it, but because the job market felt stable. I got married young, had a child young, and eventually found myself feeling unfulfilled by choices that were practical but not truly aligned with what I wanted," Anderson shares.
"It was through therapy that I finally said out loud what I think I had always known deep down: I wanted to become a therapist. But that meant going back to school with a baby at home, and it felt incredibly daunting. With support, I was able to start making brave choices instead of just safe ones. Now I’m a therapist, and sometimes I honestly can’t believe I get to live this life I once only dreamed about."
#10
Self-sabotage is a form of control.
Image credits: pau
#11
You didn’t ask to be in this world. You are not obligated to have a relationship with your parents and don’t owe them anything if they didn’t do their job as a parent to make you feel loved.
Image credits: ali :)
#12
You can just leave the room/house/place when someone is yelling at you and won’t stop.
Image credits: Exasperated llama
Anderson believes that the revelations she and others have had in therapy probably couldn't have been reached on their own.
"Therapy gave me a space I had found nowhere else. Being able to sit with someone trained to understand and support the complexities of my life allowed me to access insight I don’t think I could have unlocked on my own," she says.
#13
She did NOT hold my hand when telling me I have severe CPTSD and having to cook my own meals and take care of myself at 8 years old was not normal and was in fact ✨ neglect ✨
#14
That I need to stop trying to make logic out of things that never came from a place of logic to begin with.
#15
Just because you have forgiven someone does not mean you owe them your time or a relationship. Forgiveness is for you, not anyone else.
#16
If you struggle eating because you don't have energy to make a sandwich, you can just.. Eat the sandwich ingredients. Like a handful of lunch meat. A slice of cheese. You don't have to put it together.
Image credits: Ever 🌱 | Writer | Artist
"That said, I deeply believe that healing doesn’t only happen in therapy. We both hurt and heal in relationships, and places of community, whether through friendship, support groups, or even spaces like TikTok, can also be incredibly powerful. Sometimes the right words or a shared experience at the right time can open something in us. Therapy simply offers a consistent and intentional space to do that work with someone who can walk alongside you," Anderson concludes.
#17
It’s ok to take the shortcut. Meal planning is too much today? Eat out. Don’t want to spend $$$. Taco Bell tastes good when no one is watching.
Image credits: Paige
#18
When my therapist told me that neglect wasn’t just parents not being around…and that I was clearly neglected as a child.
#19
That sometimes if you meet someone and your mental health is worse around them it’s because you actually feel safe with them. (If they ain’t toxic obvi)
Image credits: Alicia.MP4
#20
I don't need my parents to get better for me to get better, and their issues aren't mine to solve.
#21
Sometimes the feeling that you need to control everything is controlling you.
Image credits: Ada Forbes
#22
'Rest is productive' - with chronic illness it sounds so simple. But my therapist was pointing out that my trauma taught me that to receive any form of care/love I had to do something to earn it.
#23
The way others treat you or view you rarely ever has to do with you. It’s typically a reflection of their own hatred for themselves, life, their conditionings, trauma. Be free. Be you. 🖤👐🏼
#24
Sometimes you confuse intuition with intrusive thoughts.
Image credits: Ams1212830
#25
Emotional regulation. Not everything needs a major reaction even though you are in Fight or flight mode.
#26
That it is actually selfish to not let people who want to help, help you.
Image credits: icopythecat
#27
You’re laughing about it now, but there is a version of you that is crying.
Image credits: Emma Morales
#28
“They kept trying to put you in a box that you were never meant to fit in.” On how I always felt like I was “too much.”
Image credits: tracywithawhy
#29
I'm procrastinating not because I'm lazy but a perfectionist and don't take action because I could fail.
#30
"Is the situation a 'fire' or a 'picture of a fire'." Cus anxiety will tell you THEY'RE THE SAME DAMN THING.
#31
Resentment is what you feel when someone crossed a boundary you never communicated with them.
Image credits: Maddi
#32
Overworking is a trauma response.
Image credits: Holly Howe
#33
Had been carrying a lot of guilt for years, and all she said was “it wasn’t in your control, you were a kid” with a very concerned facial expression…the guilt immediately went away.
#34
Observe don't absorb.
#35
That I kept failing at things because it was subconscious self sabotage because it wasn’t actually what I wanted to be doing with my life.
#36
All of my anxiety stems from fear of getting in trouble or being called out, so childhood stuff, and it was pretty easy to let go of once I realized.
#37
“Should” is, quite often, an agent of shame.
Image credits: Amber
#38
Anger is hurt’s bodyguard.
#39
Anxiety is grief. If I can say what am I sad about it pops the balloon of anxiety.
#40
Anger stems from fear. Now when I get angry I ask myself what about the situation scares me and it helps me better sort out of my feelings.
#41
I said “I’m afraid I’ll die alone” and he said “you might.” 😂
#42
The reason you have a hard time respecting men is because you’ve never had a man respect you.
#43
I'm a human BEING. Not a human DOING.
Image credits: Chrissy
#44
When you're trying to discern what’s real or true for you: “Anxiety screams, intuition whispers.”
Image credits: Elena
#45
When overthinking a choice/decision just pick one and when you start doubting just say "I've made my choice and accept the consequences. All choices have consequences; I've decided with the least harmful ones to me."
Image credits: dontbuyaticket
#46
Radical Acceptance changed my life.
emily_marie91
Remove your emotions/past ruminating/future anxiety about something that happened to you, and accept it as a fact and don't analyse why/how etc.
Sanne:
I'm a therapist and a client made a keychain for me with radical acceptance because she hated it at first but helped her the most. I love it!! (Both Radical acceptance and the keychain)
Image credits: Oluna
#47
What I thought was me coping well with my cptsd was actually intellectualizing and I talk a lot but not every about myself. I was an illusion and not a person to a lot of people, even me.
#48
Anxious attachment isn’t about your partner but your parents.
Image credits: Roshmi
#49
The anxiety you feel when someone’s angry at you is their energy and not your own and you don’t have to claim it.
#50
“No reflecting after 9pm.”
Image credits: Kinsey Linnae
