Dining out involves an unwritten social contract between the guest and the restaurant. While customers expect good food and service, restaurants expect guests to be respectful and reasonable. Most diners are wonderful. However, certain behaviors can strain this relationship, making things difficult for staff and management. While it’s rare to be formally “blacklisted,” consistently engaging in certain faux pas can earn you a negative reputation. Staff will remember you for the wrong reasons. This might lead to less enthusiastic service on future visits. Here are eight dining faux pas that can seriously damage your reputation with a restaurant.
1. Being Verbally Abusive or Disrespectful to Staff
This is the most serious offense. Yelling at, belittling, or being verbally abusive to any staff member—from the host to the server to the busser—is unacceptable. Restaurant work is incredibly demanding. While you can and should address legitimate service issues, doing so with aggression and disrespect will immediately earn you a bad reputation. Polite, calm communication is always more effective and maintains everyone’s dignity.
2. Frequent “No-Shows” for Reservations
When you make a reservation, especially at a smaller, independent restaurant, the establishment holds that table for you, turning away other potential diners. When you don’t show up and don’t call to cancel, the restaurant loses significant revenue. Doing this once might be forgiven as a mistake. Doing it repeatedly will get your name flagged in their reservation system. Many restaurants now require a credit card to hold reservations to combat this costly problem.
3. Making Fraudulent or Exaggerated Complaints for “Comps”
Some diners make a habit of finding minuscule flaws or fabricating issues with their meal in the hope of getting it for free (a “comp”). They might complain about a perfectly good dish at the very end of the meal after eating most of it. While restaurants want to fix genuine mistakes, they can spot patterns of chronic complainers. Attempting to scam the restaurant for free food is unethical and will quickly get you recognized as a problem customer.
4. Being an Incredibly “High-Maintenance” or Demanding Diner
Good service involves meeting reasonable guest needs. However, some diners are excessively demanding. This might include requesting numerous complex substitutions on almost every dish, sending items back multiple times for subjective reasons, or monopolizing a server’s time with constant, minor requests on a busy night. While staff will try to accommodate, being consistently high-maintenance to an extreme degree can earn you a reputation as a difficult guest.
5. Letting Children Run Unsupervised and Disrupt Other Diners
Dining out with children can be challenging, but it’s the parents’ responsibility to supervise them. Letting kids run freely through the restaurant, scream, or bother other tables is a major faux pas. It disrupts the dining experience for everyone else and creates safety hazards for servers carrying hot food and drinks. A restaurant is not a playground. Staff will remember families who allow their children to be disruptive.
6. “Camping” at a Table for Hours on a Busy Night
Lingering over coffee after a meal is often fine, especially on a slow night. However, “camping” at a table for hours after you’ve paid your bill on a busy Friday or Saturday night when other customers are waiting is inconsiderate. This prevents the restaurant from seating more guests and costs the server potential tips from new tables. Be mindful of the time and the restaurant’s business flow, especially during peak hours.
7. Consistent and Notoriously Poor Tipping on Good Service
Tipping is a crucial part of a server’s income in many countries, including the U.S. While the tipping system itself is debated, within the current system, consistently tipping very poorly (or not at all) on good, attentive service is a major sign of disrespect. Servers have long memories for terrible tippers. A reputation for poor tipping can follow you, potentially leading to less enthusiastic service on subsequent visits from staff who know their efforts won’t be fairly compensated.
8. Making a Scene or Being Excessively Loud and Disruptive
Whether due to excessive drinking or a general lack of consideration, being part of an extremely loud and disruptive group can ruin the ambiance for every other guest in the dining room. Loud, profane language or creating a dramatic scene is a quick way to be remembered for all the wrong reasons. Management may have to ask you to leave, and they will certainly be hesitant to welcome you back.
Be the Guest They Love to See
Being a great restaurant guest is simple: it boils down to respect, consideration, and clear communication. Treat the staff with the same courtesy you expect. Honor your reservations. Be reasonable with your requests. Supervise your children. Be mindful of your time and your impact on other diners. By avoiding these major faux pas, you not only ensure a better experience for yourself but also earn a reputation as a welcome guest. Restaurants remember patrons who are kind and respectful, and that’s the reputation every diner should want.
What dining behaviors do you find most inconsiderate when you’re eating out? As a former or current restaurant worker, what other faux pas would you add to this list? Share your thoughts!
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