Q: One of my coworkers is lying about a task she was supposed to complete. "Dawn" is responsible for renewing everyone's membership in our industry's professional association. However, last year she had a problem with my password, so I processed the renewal myself.
This year, I assumed that Dawn would renew my membership. I expected her to ask about the password, but she never did. Recently, Dawn submitted a report stating that all memberships had been renewed except mine. She indicated that I was supposed to handle it.
I am upset not only because Dawn lied about my renewal, but also because she is dumping her responsibility on me. Should I just ignore her and let my membership expire, even though I need it for my job?
A: If you get this worked up over a simple misunderstanding, your reaction to serious issues must be something to behold. Before making further accusations about "lying" and "dumping responsibility," you need to do a quick reality check.
While you assumed that Dawn was processing your renewal, she apparently believed you were following last year's plan. Perhaps she should have verified this with you, but on the other hand, you also could have checked with her. Therefore, no one is to blame for the resulting mix-up.
Sadly, you seem to be progressing from irrationally angry to absurdly self-destructive, since allowing a useful membership to lapse will hurt no one but you. So it's time to put on your adult hat, have a talk with Dawn, and clarify future expectations.
For example: "Dawn, there was apparently some confusion about my association membership this year. Since you're finished with the others, I'll go ahead and renew it, but next year please include me with the group. I've resolved the password issue, so that shouldn't be a problem."
The lesson to be learned, for the sake of your own career, is to avoid complicating simple situations with unnecessary drama.
Q: My company seems like an "old boys' club" when it comes to pay. A few years ago, for example, I was asked to take over an underperforming branch. After doubling the profits, I received a substantial raise, yet I was never paid as much as my less successful male predecessor.
During a recent reorganization, I was laterally transferred to a corporate position, and my branch manager job was given to a regional vice-president. Although he was actually being demoted, the vice-president was allowed to keep his salary, which is more than I was making. What do you think about this?
A: While I understand your frustration, I have no way of knowing whether your conclusion is correct. Although companies have been known to pay women less than their male counterparts, many factors can affect compensation, so the first pay disparity could have several explanations.
As for the demoted vice-president, a pay reduction does not always accompany a reduction in title. While this may not seem fair, it is not necessarily discriminatory.
But whatever the cause of your dilemma, the solution is the same. Historically, women have been much less assertive than men in talking about pay, quietly assuming that outstanding effort will be recognized and rewarded. So prepare a valid business case and go ask your boss for a raise.
