Many people are tired of tip creep and feel the practice of tipping in the U.S. needs to go. But a pair of thrifty Cheesecake Factory customers is more than happy to tip; they’re just confused about how much they should. Since they shared a salad and a side of fries between their family of six for a total bill of less than $30, they wondered whether tipping the 18-22% suggested gratuity was “fair” to their server.
In a viral TikTok, the matriarch of the Milehams family (@themilehams), Callie Mileham, 37, says, “So how much would you guys tip? So $29.12 is our total.”
She explains that in addition to the salad and fries split between the family, they also had free bread.
The patriarch of the family, Josh, 37, notes that the server did less work because they only had to bring out one entree and side rather than individual entrees per person. He says it was basically as if only the two heads of the family went out to dinner. They add that the server had to bring more water and bread due to the number of people at the table. Still, they feel it wasn’t much extra work.
“We would get extra bread anyway,” Callie says.
Viewers find the family cheap
In the comments section, many criticized the family for their frugality. Some scolded them for taking up a large table for their small bill because the server could’ve made more money in tips on another party of six.
“Nails done Apple Watch and you can’t feed your kids correctly.. you have bigger issues,” one viewer wrote.
“Extreme cheapstakes live action,” another joked, referring to the TLC show Extreme Cheapskates in which people go to extraordinary lengths to save money.
A third said, “6 sharing a salad and a fries? Don’t eat out when you can’t afford to eat out. I take my wife and kids to Cheesecake Factory all the time. Our bill is always around $250 for the 7 of us and we tip $60. Cheesecake Factory doesn’t apply an automatic 18% gratuity unless the party is at least 8 guests.”
Others offered ideas as to how much to tip
One server wrote, “At least $15. You took up my 6 top which could have been a $40 tip.”
“50% and you stop going out and take up prime seats for a $30.00 tab,” a second viewer said.
A third wrote, “You took a bigger table meaning that server lost out on being able to get a larger group with a bigger check so at minimum $10, personally i would tip $25-$30 because they would have made at least that with a normal 6 top.”
Not all viewers were against the Milehams, however. Some came to their defense, and some just took the opportunity to bash tipping culture.
One viewer said, “I wish tipping culture was canceled. I hate tipping. Honestly it’s not my job to pay you. What your employees should be paying you half of the time. All they do is bring the food out.”
A second wrote, “I guess I’m a cheapskate. Number of people is irrelevant. I tip based on the dollar amount. For 6 I would use the 22% but the number of people to me is a non factor.” The Milehams liked this comment.
Another said, “To all the haters- have you seen the portions the Cheesecake Factory gives you!? HUGE!”
Why did a family of 6 split 1 salad?
In a TikTok direct message exchange with The Mary Sue, the Milehams explained that they were recreating one of their viral videos from last year.
“We show eating out hacks and see how cheap we can feed our family,” they wrote. “So we are at Cheesecake Factory and shared a salad and fries, since that salad is huge! We also get free bread, so it worked out!”
They note that while it’s not “ideal,” their hacks may help less fortunate families dine out on a budget. “Some families can’t afford to ever eat out,” they said. “With these options, it makes it possible for them to get a nice restaurant experience without spending hundreds on a single meal.”
The couple was inspired to make content on money-saving after they shared a video of themselves making their son a quesadilla out of leftover fajita ingredients. There was a large positive response from people who loved that they were eliminating food waste. However, there were negative responses as well. Despite this, the family says, “We eat out a lot and like to share, so we decided to keep sharing about our life, how we make money, how we save, and splurge too.”
How much do they usually tip?
The Milehams said the amount they typically tip when eating out varies.
They wrote, “If we share we try to do more than 20% as long as they were good servers. We usually never leave less than 15%, even if the service is terrible. If we ask the server questions on camera, we tip more. Sometimes as much as $100-250. It’s not about us penny pinching as much as showing people how to save money.”
What does etiquette say?
Toast states that for large parties, usually six or more people, restaurants typically add an automatic gratuity of 18-20%.
“The reason for this policy is that serving a large party can be significantly more challenging and time-consuming than serving a smaller table,” Toast says. “It requires more attention from the server, as well as potentially more coordination with the kitchen and other staff members. By adding an automatic gratuity or service charge, the restaurant ensures that the server receives a fair tip for their hard work.”
TouchBistro states that if your bill has an auto gratuity due to your party’s size, you do not need to include an additional tip on top of it.
Does Cheesecake Factory have auto gratuity for large parties?
According to a Reddit post that includes a picture of The Cheesecake Factory’s menu, the restaurant adds gratuity to parties of eight or more. However, this is optional.
The menu states, “Tipping is entirely voluntary. For the convenience of our guests, we add an 18% suggested tip to parties of 8 or more, but payment of that amount is not required. Our guests always have the right to determine how much they’d like to tip.”
So, how much should they have tipped?
Since the Milehams aren’t considered a large party at Cheesecake Factory, they may decide to determine their tip amount based on standard tipping practices.
TouchBistro states that a standard tip for a sit-down restaurant is 15-20%.
When splitting the bill among several people, it advises, “The simplest way is to divide the total bill by the number of guests and split it evenly among everyone – since in theory, you all benefited from the same level of service. Another way is to each tip a set amount, like 15%, on top of the cost of the specific dish you ordered.”
Given this information and the fact that the Milehams essentially ordered a meal for one, the best practice in their situation may be to tip 15-20% of what their total would’ve been if each member of the family ordered an entree.
If the family had ordered six salads and a side of fries, their total, including tax, would be approximately $137.10. Fifteen to 20 percent of that total would be about $20.57-27.42. If they wanted to tip on the pre-tax total of $126.65, which etiquette says is OK, 15-20% would be about $19-25.33. These amounts are in line with the suggestions provided in the Milehams’ comments section.
How about with kids?
However, since four of the diners in the Milehams’ case are children, they may have chosen to use the price of a kids’ entree to calculate how much they should tip. The most expensive item on the kids’ menu is the Grilled Salmon, which costs $13.95 in Dallas, TX, where the geotag on the video indicates the Milehams are located. This is $6 less than the BBQ Ranch Chicken Salad they ordered. If they did this, their pre-tax total for four kids’ salmons, two adult salads, and a side of fries would be $102.65. Fifteen to 20 percent of this would be approximately $15.40-20.53.
@themilehams Replying to @lalaland How much would you TIP??? $29 for 6 of us at The Cheesecake Factory! ?? #tip #howmuch #whatwouldyoudo #tipculture #howmuchwouldyoutip #tipping #fyp #server #serverlife #servertok #cheesecakefactory #restaurant #service ♬ original sound – themilehams
How much did they actually tip at Cheesecake Factory?
The Milehams said that for their viral video from last year, they tipped $100 because the server was “awesome” and they asked him questions on camera.
For the Cheesecake Factory server, they tipped $20 because the service was not as good. They report that the server was hurried and inattentive; he quickly dropped the food and went away, never coming back to check if the family needed anything else. They kept having to wave him down to ask for things.
“Don’t know if he judged us on how we ordered, was weirded out about us filming, or just not an attentive server,” they said. “We still [g]ave a generous tip since we were filming.”
Final thoughts?
The Milehams said, “People are so judgmental, and tip culture is so out of hand that it’s now controversial.” They argue that no one really agrees on what to tip, “and the standard 15-20% is not good enough for a lot of servers nowadays, even though most servers make $30-60 an hour average.”
While some customers have reported being asked to tip as much as 30% of their order, it is not true that most servers make $30-60 on average. Diario AS states, “According to data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the median hourly wage for waiters and waitresses was $15.36 in May 2023.”
Despite this, the Milehams say tipping culture is a topic that intrigues them and they will continue to post about tipping and sharing food at restaurants.
The Mary Sue contacted The Cheesecake Factory via email.
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