Ah, Christmas really is almost upon us. How can we tell? Because the avalanche of sodding list shows have started in earnest. Not that they ever went away.
So tonight and tomorrow night bring "The 100 greatest family films", just in case you'd rather watch clumps of clips of C-list "What-was-he-in-again?" celebrities talking about the films, rather than, say, the films themselves.
Among the nostalgilistic gems we can expect over the next week or so? 100 Best List Shows, I Love Nostalgia, Celebrities Favourite Talking Head Clips, The Nation's Top Ten Numbers, Top 100 Clips Most Often Used in Top 100 Clip Shows Top Fifty Greatest Deities The 100 Shows That Could Frankly Be Filling This Slot More Entertainingly Right Now
Possibly.
But luckily, that's not all that's on tonight, there's lots of other stuff, and it's better. What is it? Well, let me tell you, with help from the picks of tonight's TV, as taken from the Guide...
It's Christmas With Jonathan Ross; 100 Greatest Family Films 8pm, BBC1; 8pm, C4 Wossy and guests celebrate the festive season, aided by the Pogues performing Fairytale Of New York. Unfortunately Katie Melua sings the Kirsty MacColl part. Expert use of the mute button is your friend. Other guests include Babs Windsor and Jools Holland. Meanwhile, C4 roll out another two-part shopping list, which concludes tomorrow. Films like Willy Wonka and Toy Story are talked about by various comedians and journalists with time on their hands.
Julia Raeside
Russian Godfathers 9pm, BBC2 The finale of Patrick Forbes' exemplary series examining the precipitous rises -- and, almost invariably, calamitous falls -- of the mega-rich "oligarchs" of postcommunist Russia focuses on Yury Luzhkov. Luzhkov, the long-serving and popular mayor of Moscow, has somehow parlayed his meagre state salary into a colossal fortune -- he is, by some accounts, the richest man in Russia. He now faces a confrontation with the same nemesis who has done, one way or another, for most of the oligarchs: President Vladimir Putin. Excellent.
Andrew Mueller
Don't Panic About Christmas Shopping 10pm, BBC2 Only 50 hours left to Christmas Day. If, like most men, you haven't purchased a single present yet, fear not, here is a programme to reassure. It will convince you that you're being strategic rather than lazy. Last minute shopping has been much-maligned but this show has scientific proof that it can actually yield better results. Think of that: science says you can buy all your presents between 2pm and 4pm on Christmas Eve.
Clare Birchall
The Borrowers (Peter Hewitt, 1997) 2pm, CBBC A spirited screen version of the Mary Norton stories about the tiny folk who live under the floorboards, and off human scraps. Jim Broadbent and Celia Imrie are a joy as the parents of little Arietty (Flora Newbigin), all coming to the aid of the nice family who are being oppressed by rapacious lawyer Ocious Potter (John Goodman, in one of his larger-than-life performances). Some little gems of SFX, too. PH
Casanova 9pm, BBC3 A repeat showing of the juicy tale of Giacomo Casanova starring new Doctor Who David Tennant and written by the genius new Doctor Who creator, Russell T Davies. Tennant is suitably raffish and saucy as the naughty trouser-dropper and he's surrounded by a gorgeous-looking bunch of bosom-heaving, pantaloon-filling sexpots, furiously winking at each other. The word romp was invented to be used in reviews about programmes like this. Go on then. It's a fabulously lusty romp, smothered in lashings and lashings of smut. With Peter O'Toole, Nina Sosanya, Laura Fraser and Matt Lucas.
Julia Raeside
The Devil's Backbone (Guillermo del Toro, 2001) 11.30pm, BBC4 Mexican-born Del Toro has since graduated to the major league with movies such as Blade II and last year's Hellboy, but let's hope he hasn't abandoned less commercial projects like this: a distinctive arthouse ghost story set in an orphans' home during the Spanish civil war. Janitor Eduardo Noriega, a former pupil, is a threat to the innocent pupils and corrupt staff alike. Meanwhile new boy Carlos must find out what happened to the last occupant of his bed, whose ghost is still lurking in the cellar. It's not really a horror film -- the scares are skilfully blended into the political and personal dramas -- but even the scenes in broad daylight are filled with dread.
Steve Rose
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What's that, you say? I said I would be doing all the TV things to the tune of traditional carols this week?
Erm.
Well that *is* to the tune of a carol. It's just a really obscure one you've never heard of. And Which doesn't require a rhyme scheme. It's modern.
*Ahem*.
