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Lucy Wigley

‘The person who knew me the best had rejected me’ - Sally Phillips reflects on her divorce and the incredible ‘tribe’ who picked her up afterwards

Sally Phillips attends the Women of the Year Lunch and Awards at Royal Lancaster Hotel .

Actress and comedian Sally Phillips has revealed some poignant insights into how she felt when her marriage came to an end.

Sally's former husband, Andrew Bermejo, left her in 2017 after 14 years of marriage - the couple share three sons.

Across a lengthy career spanning more than 30 years, Sally is well known for portraying the brilliant Shazza in all four Bridget Jones films, as well as for her performances in Veep and Smack the Pony.

The comments about her divorce came during an episode of Lorraine Candy and Trish Halpin's Postcards From Midlife podcast, where Sally discussed her biggest midlife setbacks.

Midlife challenges don't come a lot bigger than the end of a marriage. "The person who knew me the best had rejected me," Sally recalls of her initial thoughts when Andrew walked out of her life.

However, she heaps praise upon the brilliant "tribes" of women who stepped in to pick her back up again at this low point in life. A good friend jumped in to shut these feelings down, telling the actress, "he never knew you best."

"She was right," Sally concurs, "He never knew me best." She continues, "That explains itself, doesn't it, that sentence? She knew me better than he did."

(Image credit: Hanna Lassen/Getty Images)

Sally has previously shared that issues began in her marriage following the birth of her son, Olly. Now aged 20, Olly was born with Down's syndrome.

According to My London, Sally once said, "We'd had a divide that started after Olly in that my husband and I dealt the diagnosis in very different ways and then this division over babies got wider, because he hadn't really taken on board that I was pregnant."

Now, Sally believes life "is all about friendship, especially for women." She says, "Special needs parents are just the most fantastic gang," of the support she gets from fellow parents who have children with additional needs.

"You need your tribe," she says, adding, "I feel so lucky - I have an acting tribe, I have real children and fake children, I have special needs parents, and I have uni friends. I do feel very, very lucky."

The actress was also going through her divorce when the menopause hit, and for a time, she believed her symptoms were stress-related and caused by the separation.

"I'm not sure when my first symptoms arrived," she explains during an episode of Boots UK Menopause Monologues. "I was going through a divorce and thought the night sweats were stress, and the brain fog was to do with that," she adds.

"The gigantic rage I had all the time, there were other explanations for it," she says. The star, now 55, uses her platform to promote age positivity and self-acceptance. She also offers humorous advice on navigating the challenges of menopause after her own experiences with it.

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