I agree with Gaby Hinsliff (Children thrive in a loving family, no matter how unconventional, 1 September) and, like her, lament our lack of words outside of blood-tie labels to identify those who are very important to us. Fortunately, some cultures do, such as the Māori, who use the word whānau (pronounced “fa-nu”), which loosely means “my people” and includes anyone of importance, blood relative or not. We might also remember the ancient wisdom embedded in most, if not all, cultures that it takes a village to raise a child.
Damian Griffiths
Cheltenham, Gloucestershire
• What would you call the son of your son’s partner? He already has a loving father and four grandparents, but lives with his mum and your son. I suggested a “bonus” grandson following the modern Swedish tradition. There is an extra poignancy because this boy will only ever be your one grandchild.
Many children thrive despite their background. My own father was abandoned after his young father died in the war. Instead, he was brought up by kind foster parents. As a man he spent four years as a prisoner of war, so he understood loneliness and deprivation. But he was always cheerful and ready with banter. In the end it is character and integrity that matter.
Geraldine Lee
Norwich
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