A woman’s relationship may have ended abruptly after she caught her boyfriend red-handed “microcheating.” In a viral video, Bella (@spillingtheteawithbella) shares how she was chatting with her boyfriend about dinner plans when she suddenly looked up at the TV.
“He has no idea he’s screensharing,” Bella writes in the text overlay of her clip, which earned 1.8 million views. The boyfriend is heard off-camera asking Bella, “Where you want to go for dinner tonight?”
Bella has her hand over her mouth before flipping the camera to show her TV. On the big screen, for Bella to see, is her boyfriend scrolling through Instagram photos of influencer Breckie Hill. According to Bella, he has no idea his phone is connected to the TV. He clicks on a photo of Hill in lingerie, before asking Bella if she wants Chick-fil-A again.
Her answer is a resounding “no.”
But did this really happen?
While Bella’s video racked up over 3,000 comments, mostly from women, it appears not everything is as it seems. Bella wrote in her caption, “Bro I already [knew] he was sus because he had 6 red flags on tea,” she wrote, adding the hashtags: #breakupstorytime #datinglife #arewedatingthesameguy.
A quick look through Bella’s profile paints a picture of what’s probably really going on. All of her videos are subtle–or not so subtle–promotions for the app “Tea.” Each clip is about her boyfriend cheating, getting caught, or catching her best friend’s man on “Tea.” Every video also has a caption talking about Tea.
While Bella doesn’t link to the app in her bio, like other TikTokers doing the same strategy, a search on the App Store results in the dating advice app Tea as well as one called Are We Dating The Same Guy? It is unclear which one Bella is promoting.
@spillingtheteawithbella Bro I already new he was sus because he had 6 red flags on tea…. #breakupstorytime #datinglife #arewedatingthesameguy ♬ original sound – FBIbella
For viewers, it’s real enough
Despite Bella’s more than likely fabricated cheating stories, viewers have had very real experiences similar to the one she shared.
“Please tell me you’ll leave him,” one user urged. “My husband was doing this years ago & I forgave him & stayed continued to build a family with him. Years later now I found out he’s been hiring escorts. I’m finally divorcing him after 25 years & 4 kids. Men like this don’t change so change the man.”
Another echoed this, writing, “Leave. I’m 27 years into this. It never ends.” A third user added, “Micro-cheating is real and it hurts!”
What is micro-cheating?
Micro-cheating refers to “small breaches of trust in a relationship that don’t pass the threshold into a physical affair,” per Psychology Today. With the normalization of dating apps and online dating, it’s easier to microcheat now more than ever. Choosing Therapy listed several examples of what could constitute microcheating:
- Messaging or texting someone in a flirtatious way
- “Liking” or posting a provocative comment on someone’s Instagram/Facebook page
- Lying about your relationship status online or in person
- Keeping a dating profile to see if you get matched with someone “better” than your main person
- Giving your phone number to a person you know is attracted to you
And many more.
Ultimately, what one considers micro-cheating is up to the people in the relationship, but if you feel your partner is hiding his actions or you feel uncomfortable with his social media use, there’s a very real chance you are experiencing micro-cheating.
The Mary Sue reached out to Bella via TikTok direct message.
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