According to a slew of reports in August, a Hollywood studio was planning to sign a $60m (£45m) deal to bring the story of the so-called Bad Boys of Brexit – Nigel Farage, Arron Banks and co – to screen in a landmark six-part TV series. Have we heard anything about it since then?
Yes. The series is in preproduction and slated to air next autumn.
Yes. But the figure was wrong and it’s going for $90m, making it even more expensive than Game of Thrones.
Yes, although a late bid from Netflix has now come in with a view to it replacing House of Cards as its flagship political drama.
No, of course we haven’t.
In recent months, Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Spacey have entered rehab. What condition do they have?
Sex addiction.
Abuse addiction.
Scandalitis.
They are not ill.
In July, Justin Bieber cancelled the remainder of his Purpose world tour to put what on a more sustainable footing?
His soul.
His lifestyle.
His menagerie.
His energy consumption.
What is the average amount of time that elapses between Girls creator Lena Dunham saying something stupid and having to apologise for it?
Two hours.
Two days.
Six hours.
Six days.
In April, second-tier Kardashian Kendall Jenner attempted to end racial conflict and sundry other injustices in the US with what?
A Pepsi can.
A second gunman on a grassy knoll.
A really versatile contouring palette.
A vast nationwide programme of education spending (including, but not limited to, ending school segregation), the end of mass incarceration and voter suppression, complex and sustained economic outreach policies and positive discrimination, and an understanding that keeping up with the Kardashians should probably be bumped down to America’s second priority.
In August, Jeremy Clarkson liked a series of lesbian porn clips on Twitter. What explanation did he give for this?
He likes lesbian porn.
He had actually meant to tell a racist joke instead, but became momentarily confused by Twitter’s user interface.
He left his phone unattended near some drunk people.
He likes to unapologetically push boundaries because that’s just who he is.
In July, Princess Diana’s former “psychic” and “energy healer” Simone Simmons claimed that the princess had been in touch with her. According to Simone what did Di tell her?
To please, please, please stop giving interviews claiming to have spoken to her.
That she wouldn’t have been seen dead appearing at the pay-per-view seance on US TV in which Simone took part in 2003.
That she’d married Elvis in heaven.
That she’d have voted Brexit.
In January, Johnny Depp was revealed to be in dispute with his accountants. Which of the following is not a real line item from his outgoings?
$15,000 a year cleaning the internet of articles relating to allegations of domestic abuse.
$30,000 a month on wine.
$200,000 a month on private aviation.
$3m on firing Hunter S Thompson’s ashes out of a cannon.
At the Oscars, Earth’s most self-regarding event, whose fault was it that the best picture was accidentally awarded to La La Land when it should have gone to Moonlight?
Presenter Warren Beatty.
The then Academy president, Cheryl Boone Isaacs.
Some accountant no one has ever heard of.
Don’t call it a fault – it is literally still hilarious 10 months later.
In June, Penguin Random House published a coffee-table book by 18-year-old photographer Brooklyn Beckham, which was accompanied by a touring exhibition that opened at Christie’s in London. According to its photographer-author, what are “so hard to photograph, but incredible to see”?
Comets.
Superman and Clark Kent together in the same room.
Elephants.
Visitors from the spirit world.
In June, who said of the WikiLeaks founder: “Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is no more. The Obama administration is gone. Julian [Assange] won, and we all benefited from this. He took on the Leviathan and won. That is sexy.”
Vladimir Putin.
Donald Trump.
Pamela Anderson.
David Hasselhoff.
In April, Brad Pitt combined a GQ Style interview with a fashion photoshoot in America’s national parks. What was the most pretentious question asked by the interviewer?
“What is pain – mental and physical?”
“Is the sculpting a sisyphean thing: rolling the rock up the hill, action obliterating all thoughts?”
“So were you there for speaking in tongues?”
“I don’t know why this comes to mind, but I think of a house – how do you renovate yourself?”
Solutions
1:D, 2:D, 3:A, 4:B, 5:A, 6:C, 7:D, 8:A, 9:D, 10:C, 11:C, 12:B
Scores
2 and above.
Poor show. In a year devoid of any other news than showbiz comings and goings, your lack of focus is disturbing.
3 and above.
Poor show. In a year devoid of any other news than showbiz comings and goings, your lack of focus is disturbing.
4 and above.
Average. You’re neither a Lost in Showbiz obsessive nor a Lost in Showbiz ignoramus. This is a polarised world: pick a lane.
5 and above.
Average. You’re neither a Lost in Showbiz obsessive nor a Lost in Showbiz ignoramus. This is a polarised world: pick a lane.
6 and above.
Average. You’re neither a Lost in Showbiz obsessive nor a Lost in Showbiz ignoramus. This is a polarised world: pick a lane.
7 and above.
Average. You’re neither a Lost in Showbiz obsessive nor a Lost in Showbiz ignoramus. This is a polarised world: pick a lane.
8 and above.
Try not to despise yourself for the couple of easy ones you got wrong.
9 and above.
Try not to despise yourself for the couple of easy ones you got wrong.
10 and above.
Try not to despise yourself for the couple of easy ones you got wrong.
11 and above.
Congratulations! You won the chance to be my holiday cover!
12 and above.
Congratulations! You won the chance to be my holiday cover!
0 and above.
Poor show. In a year devoid of any other news than showbiz comings and goings, your lack of focus is disturbing.
1 and above.
Poor show. In a year devoid of any other news than showbiz comings and goings, your lack of focus is disturbing.
