Now for Broken Promises, Shattered Dreams, the occasional series wherein we we take a look at the vanity projects various celebrities have announced, only for them to disappear without trace. We've previously examined My Honourable Friend, the ITV sitcom in which Dale Winton promised he and Jimmy Nail would play MEPs sharing a Brussels flat. The search for that one has been scaled down, but I don't think any of us will feel a sense of closure until they recover the script.
Today, we ask after the whereabouts of Guy Ritchie's Knights of Malta epic. Remember this? Way back in 2001 back when Guy Ritchie still thought he'd be allowed to do anything other than churn out ever-cheaper imitations of his first movie the Lock Stock fauxteur announced grandiose plans for an enormo-budget 16th-century epic based on the siege of Malta Alas, it appears Guy was last drawn on the subject in 2005, when he explained the delay thusly: "A load of other epics came out, so I thought I'd see how they did."
They did really well. Again: what happened? He didn't elaborate, but would only say he'd taken a year writing the script and he wanted it to be like "the best of that type Pirates of the Caribbean". Can you even imagine? There is literally not a single movie Lost in Showbiz would like to see more than this. In fact, as of today the Knights of Malta ride again. Of that Mister Ritchie, you may be sure.
