"Laughing, clapping and standing ovations are allowed," the booking information reads.
This is the first comedy night I've been to where that's had to be spelled out in advance.
But this is no ordinary show. Manchester's legendary Frog and Bucket has been chosen to pilot the UK's first live stand-up performances since venues closed back in March, to test out the safety measures that will allow comedy, gigs and theatre shows to return.
"The Government said if you don't all spit in each other's mouths, maybe comedy will come back - maybe ," compere Kiri Pritchard-McLean tells the crowd.
The last few months have been no laughing matter, with the Covid-19 death toll still ticking and the devastating impact of lockdown laying waste to countless jobs.
The performing arts industry has been among the hardest hit, with redundancies at institutions such as Manchester's Royal Exchange theatre feared to be just the tip of the iceberg.
A lot is riding on getting events like this right - with spikes in cases across Europe after the lifting of lockdown restrictions, and the recent reintroduction of measures in Oldham following a surge in new cases there, both lives and livelihoods hang in the balance whenever rules are relaxed.
Fortunately the Frog & Bucket is taking its responsibilities very seriously.
Capacity has been cut to around 80 people to allow tables to be spaced out, although there's still a lively atmosphere.
Drinks orders are taken at tables by waiters wearing masks and gloves, with little bottles of hand sanitiser clipped to their aprons - although face coverings aren't mandatory for audience members.
Staff scurry around quietly throughout the show, spritzing railings and door handles with disinfectant and wiping down the hand sanitiser stations that are dotted around the venue.
An anti-viral fogging machine will also be used to sanitise the entire premises daily, and an air conditioning and filtration system is also in use.
A one-way system is marked out inside the venue, looping past the toilets, where a steward stands guard to make sure only three people are inside each facility at once.
"Normally I would say go get a drink, but stay where you are ," Kiri orders at the first break.
"Unless you need a cig or a p***. Those are the f***ing rules, this is how we have fun now."
Comedy has never been more missed than it is right now. Human nature will find the humour in the darkest of times; it helps us to cope, to connect.
And the absurdities of life under lockdown provide plenty of giggles throughout the night - from the competitive saucepan banging of the Thursday night Clap For Carers to support bubble etiquette.
Who among us hasn't had to resort to some crafty root cover-up tactics while hairdressers were shut? Probably not using Cherry Blossom shoe polish though, like Shazia Mirza, who opens the show with tales of how her home dye job melted down her face live on Good Morning Britain.
The all-female line up - a showcase and fundraiser for the Women in Comedy Festival in October - also features entertaining performances from Siân Davies and Ola Labib before headliner Barbara Nice, the comedy creation of Phoenix Nights star Janice Connolly, takes to the stage.
"I've been asked to be in so many bubbles I feel like a bar of pigging Aero," she says, clutching her Fray Bentos tote bag and another handbag shaped like an accordion.
Her brilliantly bonkers cabaret-esque skit has the crowd up on their feet and dancing at their tables (that's still allowed, too) and ends with her winding purple wool around an upturned bar stool to 'measure the fun' to show to Boris Johnson.
"This'll be all over the daily briefing," she nods sagely, just before the ball of wool tumbles off the stage and into the front row.
"DON'T TOUCH IT. WE'LL GET BLOODY SHUT DOWN."
Jokes aside, officials will be watching events like tonight closely - and all being well, it'll pave the way for live performances to resume at other comedy clubs, gig venues, theatres and concert halls from Saturday.
In reality, many may take longer to welcome audiences back, with tight margins making it financially difficult for everyone to operate at the reduced capacities required by social distancing rules.
"This is very literally an experiment, so the fact you came gives us so much hope that we can bring live comedy back," Kiri says as the show draws to a close.
Let's hope Boris thinks so too.
