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Sophie Doughty

'I'll never be the same again' - Benwell mum's heartache 15 years on from son's tragic knife-attack death

When Margaret Smith woke-up today, her first thought will have been the same as every other morning.

But today marks a heart-breaking milestone for the grieving mum who has now endured the unimaginable pain of losing a child to violence for 15 years.

Margaret's beloved son Mark died on May 3 2007, an hour after he was stabbed in the neck in Newcastle's West End.

Read more: Locked up: The North East criminals put behind bars in April 2022

He was just 16 years old.

In the weeks and months that followed her son's senseless death, Margaret admits she lost the will to live and turned to drink to cope.

Mark Smith (newcastle chronicle)

But after finding the strength to go on for the sake of her daughter and grandchildren, Margaret has somewhere learned to live with the loss that is always on her mind.

And today, on the anniversary of Mark's death, the 61-year-old has told of her 15 years of torture, and the friends that have helped her cope.

Margaret said: "It's every day from waking up to going to bed. The pain never goes away, I just play it over and over in my head.

"I'll never be the same again. It doesn't feel like 15 years ago, it just feels like yesterday. People ask me how I cope, but you just don't have a choice."

Mark, who lived in Benwell with his family, told his mum he was going out to play on a friend's computer on the night he was stabbed.

Mark and his 16-year-old killer got into an argument in the street and Mark swung a punch at the other lad, Newcastle Crown Court heard at the time.

But the boy was holding a kitchen knife, which he sank into Mark’s neck. The blade sliced through a major blood vessel before penetrating a lung.

Trainee mechanic Mark ran from the scene but collapsed in the street close to his home. He was pronounced dead an hour after he was stabbed.

The teen killer, who cannot be named for legal reasons, pleaded guilty to manslaughter and was locked up for just 18 months, while his older accomplice who gave him the kitchen knife was jailed for two years.

And as Margaret battles her daily agony, she has also struggled to accept that those responsible for her son's death are walking the streets.

"Mark's gone and they are just living their lives," she said. "He would have been in his 30s now. I always think about what he should be doing now. I wonder if he would have become a mechanic, because that's what he loved doing. And would he have had kids?"

In the 15 years since Mark's death, Margaret has been devastated every time she hears of another young life lost to knife violence.

"There's been so many knife crimes since," she continued. "They will never ever learn until it's one of their own.

"People think it's all cushty to take a life and go to jail and have a holiday. But how do they live with that every day."

Margaret, who works as a cleaner, has found comfort from new friends she has made who have also lost loved ones to murder or manslaughter in the North East.

"I have made a few friends through what happened," she said. "We are all going through the same thing. You would never think that you would find friends through losing a child. We are in a group that nobody wants to be in."

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