UEFA can’t be far off replacing their iconic pre-match anthem with the Benny Hill theme tune and asking their officials to don big shoes and flowers that squirt water at players instead of issuing yellow cards.
European football’s governing body pitched their big top at their headquarters in the Swiss town of Nyon on Monday morning, with poor Andrey Arshavin roped into helping them perform their latest circus act (seriously, as if having to play for Arsenal for four-and-a-half years wasn’t humiliating enough).
Never one to disappoint their fans, UEFA made an absolute meal of a seemingly simple task, failing to correctly pluck balls out of comically oversized bowls before Dave Benson Phillips appeared from out of nowhere to cover everyone on the stage in gunge.
A redraw later in the day saw Manchester United finally discover they would face Atletico Madrid in the Champions League round of 16 and while UEFA’s calamitous mistake left us basking in the comedy of their incompetence, it’s perhaps saved United from a disastrous repeat of their own.
Just under three years ago, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer walked into Old Trafford looking no older than he did when he hung up his boots at United back in 2007.
Solskjaer was appointed interim boss following the departure of Jose Mourinho, yet a stellar run of 14 wins from 19 games - the highlight of which was a memorable triumph over Paris Saint-Germain in the last 16 of the Champions League - saw him handed the reins on a permanent basis.
Suffice to say the decision to offer him the permanent role never really had the desired effect and last month he was relieved of his duties as Ralf Rangnick took his place in the Old Trafford dugout.
There’s an odd similarity in United’s two most recent managerial appointments in that Rangnick has also enjoyed an impressive start to life at the club, with some beginning to wonder whether he too should see his interim status revised.
A victory over French giants PSG in the last 16 of the Champions League would have provided yet another eerie parallel with Solskjaer’s reign and United may have dodged a bullet in having to consider repeating history by handing their interim boss the full-time job.
It would be remiss to suggest that no matter how well Rangnick performs in his spell as interim boss that he should never be considered for the permanent role and you’d do well to argue he wasn’t deserving of it should he pull a rabbit out of the hat and guide United to Champions League glory.
However, a strong start to life as boss can’t be enough for the United hierarchy to jump the gun and get the contract drawn up once again. All avenues need to be considered and if there are better options out there then Rangnick should still move upstairs at the end of the season.
Much has been made of the favourable fixture list Rangnick will be forced to navigate over his first few months in charge at United and a decent run of results culminating in a win over PSG might have forced the club's hand to shove a contract under the German tactician's nose, without even considering whether there could be a better man for the job.
Great decisions have been few and far between in the United boardroom over the past few years and UEFA’s inability to conduct a task that even a merry Rod Stewart once managed to do with such swagger has possibly saved the club from falling into a trap they’ve not long managed to claw themselves out of.
It's not often you’ll hear this said but cheers, UEFA. Keep up the good work.
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