Ever wondered what a kicked puppy looked like but needed to stay true to your vegetarian Guardian principles and so couldn't kick an actual puppy? (Marina, in particular, has famously rigid vegan beliefs.) Why, let Frank Bruno show you on GMTV this week.
So Frank is on the sofa this week, talking about his "battle" with depression (like Pat Benatar, celebrity problems, from addiction to divorce, always seem to take place on a battlefield.) Fiona, bless her, opened proceedings by talking about how less than tactful some of the coverage about Frank's illness had been at the time, "with the Sun calling you 'bonkers'", she reminded him. And that was pretty bad, I think we can all agree. Hell, even Rebekah Wade seemed to agree, changing the headline in the middle of the night to 'Sad Bruno in Mental Home.'
Intriguingly, though, the one person who apparently agreed with the Sun's sensitive take on the subject was Frank himself. "Rebekah Wade was right to describe me like that because I was," he hastily interjected this morning. "I was calling her up all the time, and she's a very good editor - the editor of the Sun," he added, eyes literally widening in fear, as if invoking the name of Voldemort. "I think you better quit while you're ahead," said Fiona, with her endearingly characteristic bite.
Oh, and the other thing we learned this morning from GMTV is that Bryan Adams' next album is called 11. Add your own Spinal Tap joke.
God, I love morning TV.
