Zombies on film

This, presumably, is how zombies ought to be. Overweight, out-of-shape gastropods with one hand metaphorically in a bag of Doritos and the other wrapped around the TV remote. Coincidentally, this pair of losers hail from Simon Pegg's very own Shaun of the Dead. Photograph: PR

Alternatively, they could be like this fellow: zonked-out and placid, with its eyes tightly shut. Note the title of this 1940s horror classic: I Walked with a Zombie. Not 'Ran With', 'Jogged With' or 'Cannonballed Up the Beach With'. A gentle stroll is all that's required. Photograph: Kobal

An army, history tells us, marches on its belly - and an Army of Darkness marches on the belly of others (perhaps trampling entrails and intestines into the dirt behind). But it marches, mind. It never runs. Photograph: PR

The flesh-eating denizens of Night of the Living Dead roam the countryside in search of food. But they are a shambling, slow-witted (and crucially, slow-moving) bunch. Significantly the hero of George Romero's landmark film is killed by a speeding bullet as opposed to a speeding zombie. Photograph: PR

But hang about, what's this? By the time of Dawn of the Dead (Zack Snyder's 2004 remake of Romero's 1978 outing) the undead have started speeding up. All at once the victims don't have to simply trot out of harm's way; they actually have to pick up their skirts and run for dear life. Unfair! Photograph: PR

Chances are that Simon Pegg takes a dim view of 30 Days of Night as well. This is about a band of cannibalistic Alaskan monsters who come rampaging out of the hills once they've eaten all the moose and drunk the oil from the pipelines. See how they run. Photograph: PR

If there's anything more scary than Alaskan zombies, it's Spanish zombies. Live on TV. In a Madrid apartment block. This, at any rate, is the premise for [Rec], which hurls a bunch of crazed - and worryingly zippy - ghouls in the direction of a hapless news reporter. Expect pitch and yaw and lots of gore. Photograph: PR

We blame 28 Days Later, which made a great play of the notion that zombies could run just as fast as regular folk - despite having withered legs and decaying brains, stopped-clock hearts and no oxygen in their bloodstreams. This might make for bad science - but try telling that to a zombie that's got its skates on and is coming at you, full-throttle. And look! That one's on fire! Photograph: PR

Oh for the days of the shuffling, shambling, black-and-white zombie. Here are a few from Ed Wood's peerless Plan 9 from Outer Space, mucking about in an open grave and about as re-animated as roadkill. They don't re-make 'em like this anymore. Photograph: Kobal