Zoe Ball has spoken of her trauma following the suicide of boyfriend Billy Yates and about how losing a love can “take you to your knees”.
The Radio 2 Breakfast DJ says she was “in shock” for two years, but pulled through thanks to the love and support of family and friends.
Cameraman Billy took his own life in May 2017 following financial problems and years of mental health issues, including depression.
Zoe said: “I believe I was in shock for two years afterwards. It’s like you can’t see beyond putting your feet on the floor and getting out of bed each day.
“Since losing Billy, I’ve met lots of people who’ve helped me have a better understanding of the complexities of mental health. But also it’s key to remember there is help available for people living with mental health issues and there is hope.”
Presenter Zoe, 49, believes there are ways to recover. Speaking about love in an interview with Red magazine, the mother-of-two said: “You find it everywhere. It’s in your friendships and your parents and your children and in music.
“Love fills your heart and breaks your heart; it’s so unpredictable, you don’t know where it’s going to come from.
“To feel love is the most incredible feeling in the world. To lose it will nearly end you and take you to your knees, but there’s always more. I look at my kids or my friends and think ‘I couldn’t love you any more’. And then I do. Love just keeps on coming.”
In the interview, Zoe also speaks about getting sober again in 2016.
She quit alcohol from 2009 to 2014 but fell off the wagon for several years.
She posted on Instagram in June 2018 that she had managed two years of sobriety and said at the time it had been “two of the toughest years of my life”.
“I’ve done a lot of work on my issues with booze,” she adds now. “I’ve been able to forgive myself. It’s taken me a long time to grow up. There is help at hand with AA and other support networks.”
Zoe also praised her ex-husband Norman Cook – AKA DJ Fatboy Slim – for their relationship which enabled them to co-parent children Woody and Nelly.
She added: “He (Norman) is such a good friend and a good guy. He’s the best dad. It’s not always been easy and it’s taken time. He’s been through a lot, I’ve been through a lot, but now we’re in a great place as parents together.
“We do sometimes look at them and go, ‘Wow, despite what we’ve been through, we made it.’ Because they’re brilliant kids.”
- THE full interview appears in the March issue of Red magazine, on sale January 30.
