Q: Our manager allows people to bring their personal problems to work. She babies these employees and seems to favor those who whine and cry the most. Her decisions are not based on logic, but on feeling sorry for people, which is extremely frustrating.
Although I have confronted my boss about her tolerance of this unprofessional behavior, I can't seem to get through to her. I've tried to make her see that she is letting these crybabies manipulate her emotionally, but she refuses to change. Do you have any suggestions?
A: This is where we learn that "managing up" does not mean telling your boss what to do. Even when constructive feedback is both warranted and well-intentioned, critiquing someone in a power position can be risky. Managers seldom respond well to pointed criticism from their employees.
However, restraint does not require you to stifle all opinions. Your comments simply need to be less impulsive and more strategic. Instead of continuing to disparage your empathic boss's personality, focus on the business issues created by her lenience. Here's an example of the difference:
Personal criticism: "I noticed that lately you've been allowing Mary to go home early. You've just fallen for her sob story, which isn't fair to the rest of us. You always baby people and let them take advantage of you."
Business issue: "Mary has been leaving early this week, so I thought you should know that this will probably cause us to fall behind on the XYZ project. If she can't work a regular schedule, then we need to figure out how to compensate for her absence."
Based on your description, I assume the main concern is that these management decisions aren't going your way. So consider this: to influence a boss who emphasizes personal relationships, you must make every effort to have a good relationship with her yourself. In this situation, that would be the intelligent approach to "managing up".
Q: My manager appears to have abandoned her position, leaving me alone in the office. Several months ago, I was hired as the administrative assistant for two housing developments. As the site manager for both properties, my boss splits her time between the two, while I stay at the larger one.
For the past three weeks, I have had no contact with my manager. She never comes into this office, and when I call the other property, I always get her voice mail. I have no idea who she reports to, because these developments are owned by a large corporation in another state.
Since I have no authority to order repairs or resolve problems, the tenants are becoming frustrated and resentful. I'm trying to find another job, but what should I do about this one?
A: First, you must inform the appropriate people about your boss's strange disappearance. This "large corporation" must have a website with a phone number, so call them and ask for the human resources department. The HR manager should be able to provide some immediate direction. After that, finding more stable employment should definitely become your top priority.
