Various parents have different parenting styles - meaning mums and dads will sometimes disagree with what another family let's their little one get away with. But one mum said she was left shocked by the "feral" behaviour displayed by her friends' children after she started hosting playdates.
And when she took to Mumsnet to ask if such outbursts should be expected, worried by what she had seen, she was told it was far from normal, though "becoming more common." The post was shared to the forum "Am I being unreasonable?", where the woman questioned if it she was being unfair "to be shocked at how many of today's children behave."
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She wrote: "Let me start by saying I'm in my early 30s and I definitely don't come from a 'children are seen and not heard'/military-family type background where children weren't allowed to speak. My parents were quite laid back in some ways."
The mum then explained she has recently welcomed her first child, and as such made her first mum friends this year. But trouble arose after she started hosting playdates and her new friends - who also have new babies - started bringing their older children along.
She said: "So it's 2x babies plus (say) a 4 year old and a 5 year old, or a couple of 3 year olds plus a 7 year old. Most recently, a 5 and a 6 year old with 2 babies visited. and JESUS CHRIST, the average behaviour is feral!
"Most have been jumping on the sofa (to the point I thought it was going to break springs and had to tell them to calm it down myself eventually), one child going into our bedroom and looking through the wardrobe (!!) when going to the bathroom, one was repeatedly sneaking into the kitchen where i was making lunch and stealing stuff from the fridge 10 minutes before i was due to serve it, lunch just smashed up into a ball of mess and not eaten by older kids (5-7 years) regularly.
"Getting up halfway through a meal to run off and play with toys at age 8. Constant whining for snacks and sugar drinks. One refused to drink anything at all during a 2hr visit because we only had milk or water (i literally had no juice in the house to offer)."
Her rant continued: "Stealing food from other people's plates. Constantly interrupting adults having a chat - not while being ignored, just as the normal way of communicating. Ramming metal car toys into the wall so the wallpaper is scratched and the plaster has dents in it in the living room.
"A few days ago, one little "darling" decided it would be funny to remove all the sofa cushions and drag them into the dining room so no one could sit down until it was all fixed as we helped the littler DC take shoes and coats off, then the %/6 (ish) child stood giggling while the adults just sorted it."
Explaining the issue, she added: "If I'd done that as a kid as a guest my mum would have brought the wrath of god down on me there and then!
"I genuinely don't believe a lot of this would have been accepted when I was a kid, and the first couple of play dates, i thought we'd just met a couple of bad apples, but it's now 5-6 visits with 3 different families."
And her husband was equally unimpressed. "He's sick of people not telling their kids how to behave as a guest and feels similarly uncomfortable at e.g. having to intervene when a child has been doing something dangerous or damaging while the parent sits and ignores it," she wrote.
Perplexed, the mum concluded her post by asking: "Please tell me this isn't normal????"
"Let me be clear, the kids seem perfectly NICE as children, and they play nicely, e.g. sharing toys, it's just the general disrespect for adults or breaking things that i am finding absolutely shocking," she also clarified.
But parents were quick to reassure the new mum this is "not normal" behaviour for all children, though many said it is becoming increasingly common.
One person said: "Definitely don't think that's normal! I wouldn't have stood for any of that."
And a second added: "It's not normal, my children would be taken straight home for any of this. They know there are different rules at other people's homes. I'd be mortified if they behaved in the way you've described."
However, another person wrote : "This behaviour isn’t normal but is becoming more common… kids of all ages seem to be completely feral."
Someone else agreed: "Unfortunately it's more and more common these days!"
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