A mum has voiced her upset over her mother-in-law making comments about her five-month-old baby for crying or stirring, referring to them as temper tantrums. She says it has become a regular thing that she will say if the baby makes a sound.
In a post shared on Mumsnet, the woman asked for advice on how to tell her mother-in-law that she doesn't like the way she is speaking about the baby. She said: "This week my partner was making his bottle as his bottle was due and was getting a little twisty (not crying) and she said 'never mind you and your temper tantrums'. She made a very similar comment the week before as well."
The mum added that her baby is five months old and is a "very chilled and happy baby and just quite easy in general," but whilst he is so young when he is tired or hungry he begins to stir. The woman said her mother-in-law refers to them as temper tantrums or says "he's got a right temper on him." You can get more stories like this by subscribing to our newsletters here.
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The new mum said she is due to attend a family funeral but is uncomfortable at the idea of leaving the baby with her mother-in-law in case he does start to cry as she said: "I would hate to know what she would say then."
Whilst the woman asked for advice on how to approach the situation as she had tried to brush it off, she said that she was kicking herself for not telling her mother-in-law that these persistent comments are really affecting her and to add that he is only a five-month-old baby so will of course cry when he needs or wants something.
She added: "My son is very chatty at the moment and makes a lot of little sweet noises. She was holding him last week and he was making 'oooo' noises and she turned him around and said 'what's all that about' not really in a light-hearted way but as if it was him misbehaving or something?"
What's your thoughts on this? Let us know in the comments.
In the comments one person said: "I think this is one of those things for your husband to bring up with her in private and ask her to stop saying. An aunt of mine would say that my daughter was “being naughty” at that age and it really wound me up as it was such a stupid comment. It’s not meant harmfully but is incredibly annoying."
Another added: "Not for everyone but I cannot tolerate s**t like that. I’m usually very polite but I can’t stand digs. Years ago, my first son was crying as I was holding him. My MIL said “oh poor you, mummy doesn’t know what you need, does she?" I told her that if she ever made snide comments like that again, she wouldn’t be welcome in my house. She went bright red and has never tried it again. The best piece of advice I was ever given as a young person is that if someone is upsetting you, tell them to firmly to stop. It’s saved me endless drama and hassle in my life."
Whilst another said: "Unfortunately I think you are overthinking it. I completely understand why you feel p****d off though. If my MIL so much as breathed after I had my first child, it would p*** me off. Every little thing irritated me about her and I started to hate her. After I had my 2nd child, I suddenly realised that I had massively overreacted a lot of the time. Not all the time mind. But some of the smaller comments seemed so much bigger in my head than they actually were. I'm a bit embarrassed now about how I reacted. I think it's something that is ingrained in a new mother to be quite defensive and protective etc and I think it turns us all a bit loopy."
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