Love alone isn’t enough to keep a relationship going. It takes mutual respect, shared goals, and real partnership to make things work.
But after two years together, this woman realized her boyfriend didn’t seem to understand any of that. From criticizing her home to pushing her to include his daughter in her will and fund a business for her, the demands kept piling up. She started to feel less like a partner and more like a financial plan.
Unsure if she was overreacting, she asked Reddit if breaking up was the right call.
The woman noticed her boyfriend saw her less as a girlfriend and more as a financial resource
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Unsure what to do, she asked the internet if breaking up was the answer
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Nearly half of couples admit to arguing about money
Money has a way of creeping into every corner of a relationship. It’s not just about who picks up the check or how much is spent on groceries—it’s deeply tied to values, priorities, and unspoken expectations.
Whether a relationship is thriving or barely holding on, money often brings underlying tensions to the surface. And according to a 2024 Fidelity study, nearly half of couples admit they argue about it at least occasionally. Honestly, that number feels low.
It makes sense, then, that financial responsibility ranks so high on the list of desirable traits in a partner. A survey from the BMO Real Financial Progress Index found that 96% of people consider it one of the top three green flags. Following close behind are “talking about money openly” (94%) and “having a good financial plan” (92%).
None of this is shocking. The world runs on money, and smart financial choices matter, regardless of how much you’re working with. But being good with money on your own is only half the picture. In a relationship, your finances start to overlap. Sooner or later, you’ll have shared expenses, shared goals, and shared consequences. Ignoring the topic might buy some short-term peace, but it won’t last forever.
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That’s why financial expert Brittany Wolff recommends something she calls a “money date.” It’s exactly what it sounds like—an intentional time to talk about finances, goals, and how each person views money. And yes, disagreements might come up. But Wolff told Bloomberg that it’s better to be honest and uncomfortable than silent and resentful.
Financial planning doesn’t have to feel clinical. Dan Slagle, a founding partner of Fyooz Financial Planning, suggests picking a neutral setting and something low-stress, like a walk or a casual brunch. The goal isn’t to run through spreadsheets. It’s to understand each other better and build trust.
Once you’ve had the conversation and figured out what matters most to both of you, try to keep the dialogue going. Even if one person manages most of the day-to-day money tasks, both partners should stay involved. Otherwise, one might feel left out—or worse, completely disconnected.
“Problems around money are going to happen—it’s a part of life,” says Brandon Gregg, a financial advisor at BBK Wealth Management. “When they do, make sure that lines of communication are open. Taking the steps to understand each other’s values and communicating regularly early on will lessen the issues.”
No one’s saying you have to agree on everything. But knowing where you both stand and having the space to talk about it can make all the difference between growing together and slowly growing apart.
In the replies, the woman shared that they had been together for two years
Readers felt her boyfriend’s behavior was a major red flag and encouraged her to break up
She later posted an update revealing that she had officially called things off
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The update was met with support, as readers cheered her on for walking away
