For some people, their connection with their kids is merely biological. They bring a child into the world without accepting the responsibilities that come with it.
This woman decided that meeting with her long-distance boyfriend was a bigger priority than caring for her four-year-old daughter. She then left the child with a male friend and never came back.
The man eventually got close to the daughter and began to seek custody, prompting a complicated situation with the woman’s family. You may want to have some popcorn handy while reading this lengthy post.
Some people aren’t meant to be parents, but still choose to have children
Image credits: Brooke Cagle (not the actual image)
A woman had plans to meet up with her boyfriend and decided to leave her child with a friend for the weekend
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However, she failed to show up on the day she promised to
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The friend was obligated to take care of the child, who struggled with the new arrangement
Image credits: EyeEm (not the actual image)
The man had no choice but to seek assistance from law enforcement
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He also contemplated escalating the matter with Child Protective Services
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However, his decision didn’t sit well with the young girl’s grandmother
Image credits: Kidsittingforever
People who abandon their children may also feel lonely
There is no excuse for abandoning your child. You’re giving them lifelong trauma they don’t deserve. However, those who do it may likely be dealing with their own issues.
“Quite often, the parents [who abandon children] feel abandoned themselves in terms of feeling isolated, not having a support system in which they can vent, talk, whatever,” Family Support Center executive director Bonnie Peters told Deseret News.
Regardless of their reasons for leaving, a parent’s sudden absence in a child’s life may cause abandonment trauma. And if it happens at a young age, as it did with Mariana in the story, it may leave her with lifelong scars when she grows older.
A 2021 review published in the National Library of Medicine suggests a link between an insecure attachment and the development of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).
The trauma can linger into adulthood if left untreated, according to licensed marriage and family therapist Dr. Luis Ramirez. As he tells Psych Central, it can manifest through the fear of abandonment.
“It will come out like sweat out of our pores as subconscious responses manifest through negative behaviors, depression, sadness, anger, anxiety, or paranoia,” he said.
The devastating effects of being abandoned as a child are likely one of the reasons why the author felt compelled to contact local authorities. Social worker Elaine Totten-Beal says people are typically hesitant to take action.
“Some people say, ‘Should I report or should I help?’ It’s not mutually exclusive,” she told Deseret News. “You can report it to people who need to know while also offering help. You can do both of those things.”
Totten-Beal adds that people reporting child abandonment can remain anonymous, and she encourages people to do the right thing. It’s a good thing the author did, but unfortunately, the unfavorable circumstances that followed were beyond his control.
Commenters didn’t hold back with their reactions as the man answered their questions
The author provided an update, stating the police had been handling the case
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The situation got more complicated thanks to the child’s mother and grandmother
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The author claimed that the girl’s relatives had been criticizing him publicly via social media
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He also admitted to feeling depressed because of the messy situation
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According to him, seeing the girl’s belongings that had been left in his possession had been difficult for him to handle
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Commenters sympathized with the man and sent their well-wishes
The author provided another update, stating that the situation got even more complicated
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He also expressed sadness about not seeing the girl anymore after exhausting all legal options
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Readers likewise felt bad for the author and tried to console him
