The internet - it's an incredible thing, isn't it? One minute you're doing something closely resembling work, the next you realise you've been reading various years-old articles about the great Movie Quote unrest for about an hour. And you've forgotten to have lunch. Again. Bloody internet.
Still, it does make you think. People saying extremely enthusiastic, unbelievable and blatently untrue things about so-so or bad films in order to boost their own fame or status, eh? Interesting. Very interesting.
Meanwhile, on a completely unrelated topic, I'd just like to say that the new series of Celebrity Fit Club is an unmissable, explosive, gut-wrenching rollercoaster ride of a show, that Tittybangbang is an unadulterated laugh-riot that should be offered on the NHS, that through Project Catwalk has been born a big shiny Goliath of presenting talent in the form of Liz Hurley, and that Hotel Babylon is the finest piece of work EVER created by the BBC. In the entire history of broadcasting.
Now I've got that off my chest, let me point you in the direction of a few other things worth watching. Maybe more worth watching. Who knows? Well, the Guide does. And you can find their picks of the day right here, right now ...
The Culture Show 7pm, BBC2 After a few disappointing films, especially the execrable View From The Top, it's been all too easy to forget that Gwyneth Paltrow is a fine actor. Academic thriller Proof, helmed by her Shakespeare In Love director John Madden, looks like a return to form. Paltrow chats about both movie and her wider career. Elsewhere, rapper 50 Cent talks about his move into film with Get Rich Or Die Tryin' (not, it's safe to say, critically acclaimed) and there's the launch of the Great British Design Quest, a poll to find the nation's favourite example of Brit design since 1900.
Jonathan Wright
Horizon: A War On Science 9pm, BBC2 Bill Hicks observed of creationists: "You think God built you in a day? Yeah, looks like he rushed it." Sadly, as this film demonstrates, America's increasingly emboldened Bible yahoos are smuggling their ideas into the mainstream in the guise of "intelligent design", an essentially creationist theory which adherents claim is a legitimate challenge to Darwin, and which enjoys the support of President Bush -- who is, one must concede, a fairly stern rebuke to the concept of evolution.
Andrew Mueller
Munich: Mossad's Revenge 10pm, C4 Eleven Israeli athletes were killed after the Palestinian group Black September had taken them hostage at the 1972 Munich Olympic Games. Rumours and accusations have circulated that the Israeli secret service, Mossad, tracked down and executed the perpetrators in the following year. The release of Steven Spielberg's new film, Munich, has reopened the controversy and has itself been criticised by some Israelis. This documentary has got hold of participating Mossad agents and the assassins who apparently carried out the murders.
Martin Skegg
BBC4 World Cinema Award 9pm, BBC4 Jonathan Ross again hosts this year's World Cinema Award, live from the National Film Theatre. The shortlist includes Kar Wai Wong's beautiful follow-up to In The Mood For Love, 2046, with Tony Leung and Gong Li; Downfall, the controversial story of Hitler's last hours in the bunker; Zhang Yimou's kinetic kung fu spies thriller, House Of Flying Daggers, starring Zhang Ziyi and Takeshi Kaneshiro; Look At Me (Comme Une Image), Agnès Jaoui's confident take on dysfunctional family relationships; Alejandro Amenábar's euthanasia drama The Sea Inside starring Javier Bardem, Belen Rueda and Lola Duenas; and the hallucinatory Thai romance, Tropical Malady.
Richard Vine
The Nominees 10pm, FX Joining the equally sublime Kath And Kim on our screens comes Aussie standup Chris Lilley's tartly deadpan, People Like Us-ish series sideswiping the annual Australian Of The Year Award, given to "people who make a significant contribution, demonstrate excellence in their field, or are inspirational role models for their community". First up, is a visit to the suburbs of Brisbane, where former policeman Phil Olivetti confesses, "I laughed at the suggestion, when I nominated myself", for saving the kids atop a runaway bouncy castle which ended up 800 feet in the air.
Joss Hutton
The King Of Marvin Gardens (Bob Rafelson, 1972) 12.25am, Sky Cinema 1 For their follow-up to Five Easy Pieces, Rafelson and Jack Nicholson shifted gears even further down for this lowlife tale. Not as flashy as Five... but there's still plenty to enjoy here -- Bruce Dern as Nicholson's conman brother trying to rope him into a decidedly dodgy deal, Ellen Burstyn his out-there girlfriend, and an atmospheric out-of-season Atlantic City -- the perfect place for these losers to wash up in.
Richard Vine
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Oh, great. There's been nothing on all week and now there are three things I want to see. All at 10pm. Bugger.
