Three more days, and it will be over. Sorry, that sounds rather dramatic, doesn't it. Lent, I mean. All of those things we've been denying ourselves since the morning after the grand excesses of pancake day - we can have them again in three days' time.
Some will have forgone chocolate for 40 days and 40 nights, others may have sworn off the bottle. Me, I seem to have given up "not having toothache", and have had it almost constantly since Shrove Tuesday. I have also given up soap operas, which hasn't been very hard, as I never watched them anyway. But then, if I'm going to go that far, I could equally say that I've given up spear-throwing, eating domestic animal brains and designing suspension bridges, because I haven't done any of those for the last six weeks, either.
I suppose if I'd been serious about the whole thing, I suppose, I should have given up something I actually like. Like watching telly. And there are, of course, people out there - many many people out there - who will have done this exact thing. While it's a laudable act, I can't help but feel the littlest bit sorry for them. Why? Because with three days to go, they're not going to be enjoying any of the lovely picks of tonight's TV, taken from this week's Guide. I will, though. Ah, the innumerable perks of atheism.
The Private Life Of An Easter Masterpiece 7pm, BBC2 Three paintings with Easter themes are forensically examined in this series. First up is the Last Supper, which experts are pained to assert has been well and truly misread by Dan Brown in The Da Vinci Code, but continues to fascinate all who see it.
Nick Taylor
The Street 9pm, BBC1 Jimmy McGovern's new series grapples with big themes in a domestic setting. In this first episode alone he tackles guilt, responsibility and retribution to great effect. McGovern wisely settles on the superior Jane Horrocks to carry this week's morality tale. Horrocks plays Angela, a mother of three embarking on a fling with a neighbour. Tragedy interrupts her fun, forcing all involved to refocus on their families with new intensity. Cameos from other street dwellers will whet your appetite for future episodes. It's what the phrase "quality drama" was made for.
Clare Birchall
This World 9pm, BBC2 Astonishing real story of a Brazilian kidnapper who targets footballers' mums. Marina, the mother of Real Madrid star Robinho, was the first, held for 41 days. The filmmakers have managed to get inside this story, interviewing Robinho, obtaining exclusive footage of his mother in captivity, and even meeting the kidnapper responsible. The palpable danger is brought home as four members of Brazil's anti-kidnapping squad are shot during the first two weeks of filming.
Clare Birchall
Northern Renaissance 9pm, BBC4 No, not the artistic legacy of Newcastle, but the importance of northern Europe during the renaissance period in art. While Italy is always lauded for its artistic accomplishments in this period, art historian and presenter Joseph Leo Koerner reckons that the chillier parts of Europe have been very underrated and their reputations are in need of rehabilitation. The first programme tonight looks at the work of Flemish artist Jan Van Eyck and 15th-century painting in Flanders.
Martin Skegg
Suicide: Undercover America 10pm, UKTV Documentary This is never going to make for particularly cheery viewing -- every year more than 30,000 Americans take their own lives. Filmmaker Eames Yates, whose own brother killed himself, investigates what has been called a growing epidemic in the US and the impact suicide has on friends and family. He talks to those who have attempted suicide as well as police officers, psychologists and counsellors who have to deal with the day-to-day reality of death and grief. Interesting and insightful, if a little depressing.
Martin Skegg
Calendar Girls (Nigel Cole, 2003) 11.45pm, Sky Movies 1 The story that changed the face of Women's Institute forever, and that fitted way too neatly into the Full Monty template for film producers to resist. It's all solid, embarrassed Brit stuff, as mature Yorkshire ladies Julie Walters and Helen Mirren take the racy decision to strip off for their local WI calendar, and raise heaps of money for charity but heaps of problematic publicity for themselves. For the most part it clips along competently, but things start weirdly catching up with themselves towards the end, as the girls head for Hollywood. If they went any further, they'd have to include the beginning of the film at the end of it, or perhaps have the girls back at home, sitting down to watch this broadcast on TV.
Steve Rose
