By now, most 2017 London Marathon finishers will either have entered the 2018 ballot and be dreaming of carb-loading and toilet queues, or have vowed never to do any endurance activity, ever again.
Right now, I think my brand new husband, Duncan, would like to be one of them.
But, having got married on Cutty Sark in Greenwich before running the 26.2 miles to Buckingham Palace, it seems only fitting that the honeymoon should also be some form of exercise-related torture. This time, the destination is the Great Wall of China. And, we’re scrambling, not running.
When people find out about the story, the first thing they ask is: “Why?” That’s the easy bit. Diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer only three weeks before my partner of 13 years proposed, it was never going to be a traditional wedding. I started running for the first time during chemo because it was the hardest thing I could think of (I spent my 20s learning to walk again after having my hip rebuilt) to show my body that it can take a lot from me, but it can’t define me. I started running because I wanted a reason to get out into the fresh air and feel the sun on my face. I started running because I wanted to feel alive when cancer had other ideas. I ran to look forward and have never looked back.
Not long after my diagnosis, my partner said he was sad that he had proposed, because I had lost the chance to celebrate a big life event. But Duncan soon realised that what he had gifted to me by saying the words I was so desperate to hear, was hope for a future I couldn’t write for myself.
When treatment was finished and he nudged me about the whole aisle thing, I decided that whatever we did, it was going to be something to offer hope to those less fortunate than ourselves. And, by “gifting” our wedding to two incredible charities (Willow and Breast Cancer Care) who gave me back my smile, that is exactly what we have done. And when else would you get the chance to justify a jelly-baby bouquet?
The 23rd of April 2017 will always be the best day of my life and the fact that it had a marathon in it (for this non-runner) makes me smile. I didn’t think it would be – particularly with my dubious medical record. There were times, sitting in the spine surgeon’s waiting room or lying on the physio bench, that I really didn’t think I would make anything but the “I do.” I was troubled with injuries for 10 months and was even hobbling on my way to the start time. But, as my amazing dad Eamonn (at 64, also running with a hip replacement) said to me: “When you have a big enough why, you can endure any how.” How right he was.
I could tell you about the times I cried myself to sleep with the pain, or the hunt for bridal RockTape (used for treating injuries). But I would rather tell you about the incredible Cutty Sark, the guests dressed for sports day and the fact that I managed to squeeze portable toilets into the marathon-related readings. I would rather tell you about the little girl near the start who came out just to shout for “the bride” or the London streets, which felt like a party in our honour. I would rather tell you about the woman who got out of a wheelchair for the first time in six months, and about the women now running through treatment because we gave them the strength to face another day.
I ran crying down Birdcage Walk (in my bespoke running wedding dress), thinking about how running has supported me, and whispering the names of all those who have supported us. For me, our wedding wasn’t just a celebration of love, but of the fact that you can go a long way with the right people by your side.
It was slow (for me, anyway; my groom was miles ahead, at 3hrs 27mins). But it was perfect and every step meant the world to me.
While a sandy beach does sound appealing right now, I know that climbing the ultimate staircase for our honeymoon – when there was a time I couldn’t take a step – will be the best way to complement our epic marathon day.
And, if you are toying with the idea of planning a marathon wedding, I would say this: do not expect to wear nice underwear. Do not expect to sleep. Fuelling is not compatible with wedding dress diets and I never did find good white bridal RockTape (mine was borrowed blue).
But, with £28k making its way to our charities and having our big day forever associated with the best show London has to offer, I would do it all over again. Just not next month. Although, if my amazing dress designer (and professional skater/Dancing on Ice star) Frankie Seaman gets her way, I’ll be “trashing” the dress at a challenge event sometime soon.
