Who knew Marxism was on trend?

So Monday was the first meeting of Govey's Un-English Activities Committee & Dave says it was actually SO fun, as in quite like Bullers but way more exciting because as well as hunting communists they get to do blacklisting and fighting this thing called the blob like in Slime City but Marxist *shudders with actual fear*. And Govey has barred women ministers in case of feminist subversion *looks around nervously* but I am going to run *blushes* this awesome fash-monitoring sub-committee to keep tabs on Vivienne Westwood, plus Govey wants to question Cara Delevingne, she could be signalling to Moscow Central with those eyebrows? I'm like God, who knew Marxism was on trend there was nothing in fashion week, Govey is like, that is EXACTLY what the blob wants you to think, when will you realise the whole platform trend was a Russian plot to make our women's legs look fat? And when Mr Cobber went Jeez what effing crap, Govey was like, permit me to remind you Lynton, history teaches us to fear above all the enemies from within?

Well apparently Govey can tell just by looking who is a Muscovite puppet as in he totally knew Letwinsky (!) was communist but nobody believed him until he drugged Dave with these like SLEEPING pills & ran to the Milibands for asylum, the filthy traitor Govey says. And Govey says to watch out for Theresa, those kitten heels contain deadly poison, and be careful around arty types, history tells us Hollywood's biggest names were red fascists? I said well I can personally vouch for Helena Bonham Carter, Govey was like, fine, yet history teaches us that those born with silver spoons are the most traitorous *quickly puts on non-silver-spoon face*.

Then Govey came to check under our bed and Mr Cobber ran in, Govey was like aargh beware the blob, the blob has broken cover and Mr Cobber went quickly prime minister sign here & Dave signed & these men brought a stretcher & gave Govey this injection, I was like God who will tell poor Sarah, but Mr Cobber was like, you have got to be freaking kidding me Sabrina, it was his missus called me in, the guy had put her name on his list?