Dulwich, south London. Well, that’s where TripAdvisor suggested in December when Oobah Butler tricked it into ranking fake restaurant The Shed number one, thanks to a legion of “reviews” by his friends and some nifty photography of “meals” using shaving foam. That’s the thing about who you trust with your tummy – it all depends on who you trust. Algorithms and the general public in all their wisdom? The French, with their penchant for coronary sauces and uptight service? In which case the Michelin Guide plumps for London, with its 546 listed restaurants, followed by Edinburgh, with 32, Bristol, with 18, and Manchester with 15.
I devolve responsibility to the Good Food Guide, going strong since 1951. London tops it for quantity and quality, followed by Bristol, with 28 restaurants listed (its dining scene has been booming of late), Edinburgh with 27, and Brighton & Hove with 21.
Unlike Michelin, though, it’s as likely to list fish shacks as fine dining, which makes for unexpected clusters: at the mouth of the Tyne, say, or three in Huddersfield, and two in the tiny village of Harome, North Yorkshire, population 261, which, per belly, must surely be the best place in the UK.
