August: sun, bathing, barbecues… one of the reasons August is so testing is that you’re supposed to have wonderful sun-soaked fun, preferably near the sea; and since all life is six to four against, even if it is sunny you’re just as likely to be in an office, cursing them for not having installed air conditioning.
The origin of holidays can be weird: the Scottish school holidays are slightly earlier than England, designed to free the more muscular kids to help with the harvest. And the Côte d’Azur was originally a place of warmth for people fleeing the cold northern winter. In Tender Is the Night F Scott Fitzgerald speaks of someone who has “persuaded the hotel to stay open in the summer” – and this, a biography reveals, actually happened.
A happy time, spoiled only by sunburn, sand in your sandwich and, for married women – at least for some of the women who read Saga, where I am agony aunt – the problem of your husband seeing and chatting up pretty, half-naked young women.
Saga readers often offer their own answers to problems: some advise making a friend of the girl, some changing beaches, but the best advice suggested the wife should come and nudge her husband’s arm with the words: “It’s time to take your medicine/nap”, or anything else to imply the man is too frail or aged to be worth the girl’s attention.
I wonder what Observer readers would think.
• This column was amended on 26 August 2015. An earlier version said that Scottish school holidays are later, rather than earlier, than England.
What do you think? Have your say below
