If you thought most adults leave saying nasty things behind people’s backs in high school, you might need to think again. That’s why workplaces where mostly college students and other young adults work might be more drama-prone than your average retail job.
This guy experienced true workplace drama when his female colleagues decided to make a “Hot or not” list. After finding out he wasn’t even included, the guy was so disappointed, embarrassed, and hurt that he didn’t know how to continue going to work every day. That’s why he decided to seek some advice and support online to know whether he was overreacting or not.
A guy found out he didn’t make the hottest guys list made by his female colleagues
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“It was like I was slapped across the face,” the guy wrote
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Humiliating comments about an employee’s appearance warrant sexual harassment in the workplace
Ranking people by their appearance and level of ‘hotness’ might have seemed okay in high school or in Mean Girls, but a workplace is definitely no place for such shenanigans. Even when the majority of the employees are in their early 20s.
Most commenters have already pointed out that this situation is a real HR nightmare. If the author were more vindictive and better versed in workplace law, he could’ve easily sued the store for a hostile work environment.
The experts at the Lipsky Lowe employment law firm point out that remarks about an employee’s appearance that cause the victim discomfort can be considered sexual harassment.
Although it’s a broad category, offensive, intimidating, or humiliating comments “can rise to the level of sexual harassment”.
The author details how he was so embarrassed and humiliated that he didn’t want to come into work the next day. The legal team at Lipsky Lowe writes that if a person is facing significant stress and dreads going to work the next day, that’s certainly grounds for a sexual harassment suit.
There’s also the element of gender here. The OP might be less willing to report this because, typically, women experience sexual harassment in the workplace. It’s more taboo for men to get offended because of remarks about their appearance, although it’s just as inappropriate and hurtful.
In the year of our Lord 2025, we’re still judging people based on how attractive they are
Appearance and whether others deem us attractive is already a major source of insecurity for many people. According to a UK survey, 65% of Gen Z employees say they feel judged and have received unwanted comments about their appearance at work.
But this also bleeds out into our personal lives as well. According to the 2016 Allure National Judgment Survey, 64% of Americans say the first thing they notice in a person is whether they’re attractive or not.
It seems that no matter how much we promote body positivity and kindness, most of us can’t help thinking that we’re defined by how we look. Half of the respondents in the Allure survey said they think appearance defines us significantly or completely.
So, pretty privilege is real. Studies show that people who are perceived to be more attractive earn higher wages. We also tend to think that pretty people are more intelligent and better leaders, and we trust beautiful people more.
We should really think twice before commenting on someone’s appearance
As much as we’d like to love ourselves, we’re still insecure about how we look. A 2020 poll revealed that 59% of Americans don’t feel comfortable in their own skin, and 68% admitted that their body image stifles their confidence.
VeryWell Mind cautions that even one comment about somebody’s appearance can make them feel way worse. And that’s especially true if the person is already struggling with body image issues.
Clinical psychologist Dr. Desta went viral in 2022 with her “Five-second rule” about commenting on people’s appearance. She said that if a person is not able to change that aspect of their appearance in five seconds, it’s probably better to keep quiet about it.
“You should never make an evaluative judgement or comment on another person’s appearance. Especially one that is purely based on your opinion,” the psychologist pointed out.
Commenters agreed that such behavior among colleagues was wildly inappropriate: “Get out of that toxic workplace”
Later, the situation got more serious, as even the owner of the store got involved
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Four months later, the guy revealed he quit the job and was prioritizing his mental and physical health
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Commenters found the story relatable: “There’s nothing more painful than being told you don’t matter”
