Deep down, the trousers I truly love are the really boring ones. If I could save only two pairs of trousers from my wardrobe, I know exactly which ones they would be. A navy pair from Vanessa Bruno and a black pair by Gap. Both getting on for a decade old now. I know that if I am stuck for time or inspiration either of these will work, with white T-shirt and trainers or with a silk shirt and heels.
It’s not that I haven’t tried to be more adventurous, it’s just that it seldom works out. Palazzo-width trousers, for instance, always look a bit alternative therapy practitioner on me, when the look I was going for was more Venice Biennale.
But I do have a soft spot for pink trousers, so this pair lured me out of my comfort zone. And it turns out I am surprised by how much I like the paper-bag waist, which is how this shape – high-waisted with a wide, soft belt – is known. The name is ridiculous, I know, but I love it. I like how cheerfully non-seductive it is. A pair of trousers that promises to make your midsection look like a bulging grocery sack of apples: I mean, at least you can’t accuse it of luring you in with false hope. And the paper-bag waist, it turns out, is a style that underpromises and overdelivers.
You know those jersey dresses that have a kind of swooshy, asymmetrical drape of fabric across your midsection, ostensibly a design whimsy but in fact strategically placed to conceal your tummy? The paper-bag waist is the trouser equivalent of that. I’m not going to lie and pretend it will give you the defined silhouette you get from a wide leather belt, I’m just going to point out that neither will it have you pining to get home and get the wretched thing off. You can tuck your top into these trousers and don’t have to breathe in to make the look work.
But the best thing about a non-boring trouser is that it takes the pressure off the rest of your outfit. The heavy lifting has been done, style-wise. I’m wearing a heel and a fancy cuff here, but in real life one or the other would be enough. Your favourite boring sweater just found its perfect match.
• Jess wears flute-sleeve top, £24.99, hm.com. Trousers, £28, asos.com. Mules, £80, dunelondon.com
Styling: Melanie Wilkinson. Hair and makeup: Sam Cooper at Carol Hayes Management.
