Duchess of Cambridge
(Picture: PA)Emoji were supposed to make life easier. Instead of texts devoid of cadence and tone, we could let people know exactly how we were feeling via the medium of little yellow faces.
And they do often help to clarify online communication, for example aiding the receiver in their interpretation of whether a question is playful or serious.
Yet they have if anything led to a proliferation of anxieties. What meaning does this monkey covering its eyes convey? Does this vegetable represent something more flirtatious?
In a world in which even starting a text with a capital letter and ending with a fully stop can qualify as a micro aggression, this sort of thing matters.
I cannot say I know the Duchess of Cambridge much better for seeing her most frequently used emoji. Does her penchant for the pineapple emoji represent a subtle admission of an occasionally prickly demeanour hiding a sweet centre? Maybe she just likes the fruit? It is delicious.
Duchess of Cambridge’s most used emoji
EmojiSeveral thousand leagues lower on the social ladder, you will find my most used emoji. But it too does not necessarily reveal much about me.
For example, one of my favourites is the fishing rod. Reader, I do not fish – my knowledge of fish extends no further than the strong belief it pairs well with sushi rice. Rather, I use it to obnoxiously notify a friend that they have taken the bait during some inane argument.
There are more straight forward ones. My phone has lots of dog-related emoji because I have a dog (Gracie, Beagle, seven months, very cheeky) and rain cloud emoji (I live in London).
There are times when even an emoji will not cut it. Next in the emoting arms race are GIFs, though these should be limited to emergencies such as mid-blind date disaster.
The truth is that in order to know what someone is really thinking – without the trouble of meeting up in person – we need to do the thing that people under 40 avoid at all cost – actually speak on the phone.
