It's not much of a claim, I know. But if there were ever a quiz about the west coast main line, one thing is for sure: I would be in the running for the top prize.
I can imagine the questions now. How long has it been taking to get from Manchester to London at the weekend? Five hours. How many spare seats on Friday night trains between the capital and the north? Minus 50, roughly. How many spare seats in first class on said trains? About 50. Funny, that.
And then there's the interactive rounds. Demonstrate your sprint for the train at Euston, when they finally announce the platform about three minutes before departure time.
Mime the intense pain of handing over a load of cash for a five-hour return journey in a packed train. Or participate in the near-riot when the seat reservations fail to upload again.
For a bonus point, perhaps, plot your circuitous journey on a map, taking in places you never knew you'd need to change trains at. Sheffield and Doncaster would be jostling for position.
As I said, I reckon I'd get pretty high marks. I hope I'd also get some kind of prize made of pure gold with which to replenish my drained bank account.
But in the meantime, a sensible timetable and some trains not comprised almost entirely of extortionately priced seats would do just fine. My first request seems almost likely (weekend train time 2.07 next weekend, apparently). Maybe Virgin could just let us all know when the second happens.
But I'm not holding my breath. The line reopened this morning after 10 years of rebuilding work, amid delays that were little surprise to any of us.
In my mind, Bletchley is more associated with signal problems than code-breaking. Rugby means delays rather than sport.
Maybe that will change, but for now I'll just brush up on my quiz questions. Regular users of the west coast main line will no doubt have extra rounds they'd like to see included – please share your experiences below.
