As if we needed any more reason to stan Matildas captain and all-round legend Sam Kerr even harder, she’s gone and given us reason to by flattening a man who disrupted a football match in England earlier today.
Photos from the match started emerging on Twitter on Thursday morning, showing the precise moments when Sam got this absolute flog of a pitch invader in her crosshairs, dropped a shoulder, and turfed him flat on his ass before walking away. Sure, she might have copped a yellow card for dropping the dickhead like a sack of unwashed potatoes, but fuck me was it worth it for the shots.
Sam Kerr has dropped the shoulder, flooring a pitch invader during Chelsea's UCL match! ???? pic.twitter.com/Z48HmRLNWm
— ESPN Australia & NZ (@ESPNAusNZ) December 8, 2021
The staunch, the shoulder, the stalk away. A true masterclass in “get the fuck off the pitch and stop interrupting you twat”.
For a while, all we could find were photos of the knock that stopped the nation — or at least stopped group chats across Australia beyond screeching “FUCK YEAH BITCH”. People were going feral over the need to see the video. Where was the video? Surely someone had to be filming this. Why hadn’t anyone uploaded this crucial footage? WE NEED THIS, DAMMIT.
You see, my Twitter, has been most vocal on the subject of the Kerr shoulder drop footage. “Where’s the footage? “When are you going to get the footage?” “Why aren’t you getting the footage now?” And so on. pic.twitter.com/A9ZdYbgifp
— Brandon Jack (@brandonjack33) December 8, 2021
Then, it appeared. A kinda-shaky phone video capturing the moment the guy stopped the match (boo) before trying to take a selfie on the pitch (ugh fuck off) and then Kerr literally stalking him like a bird of prey before laying him out flat.
— Bradley Cox (@Bcoxy2012) December 8, 2021
It’s a cinematic masterpiece and deserves its own bloody national holiday. Formally petitioning for December 9th to be the annual Sam Kerr’s Dropped Shoulder Day. Yes, this also should be a public holiday for Sam Kerr so we can all go to the park, kick a football around, and drop some idiot men who want to try and get in the way of women while they’re literally working.
the sam kerr thing is so good in part bc it realises every fantasy ive ever had about just fucking dropping a dickhead who's in my way and wasting my time at work. like im not projecting but i am thinking of 3-5 former colleagues
— spooky spice (@jenniferdown) December 9, 2021
In terms of the actual game, the score was 0-0 by the final whistle, giving Juventus a single point and keeping them in contention to qualify for finals from of Group A of the Union of European Football Associations (UEFA) Women’s Champions League. Chelsea remains on top of the Group A ladder for the time being.
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