A friend of mine once said to me, “Whenever it rained badly, I would rather my motorcycle stay the night than my girlfriend.” Crazier things have been said by riders, or rather, fanatics. So, to hear that a man chose a ride with buddies over his daughter’s nuptials…I’m afraid to say it, but I’m not surprised. And now understanding the conditions of this choice - he’d lost $22.5k when she canceled her first destination wedding, only to go on the trip anyway to take “revenge photos,” part of me was sympathetic.
But then again, life’s about choices.
The father chose to bring up a kid who didn’t appreciate money, people, or a classy exit. He could have also told his clearly ungrateful daughter that “revenge photos” are for people who can fund their own vacations, to Puerto Rico in this case. Then, instead of taking this as a teachable moment (for both of them) where they could bond over being annoying and possibly have a chance to grow, he exited stage left for a not really once-in-a-lifetime ride to Glacier National Park.
It’s not like a trip to Nepal or Mongolia or the Arctic Circle. It was Wyoming. Like, woo.
But upbringing is at the root. And if you look at it existentially, he’s the problem. She’s merely the symptom. So, again I ask, was this dad right to skip his kid’s wedding for a moto trip?
Yes, I understand that this question is subjective. Some people very much value family and marriage, and open bars. Those are the many who would likely never consider bailing out on their loved ones in their time of need or celebration, no matter how unsavory they might be. (That’s why we put up with our in-laws, right?) But those people probably didn’t blow a UTV equivalent of money on a party.
As someone who once selfishly cancelled my own wedding to go on a free moto tour to Thailand, I can understand the letdown people experience, the investments they lose, and the resentment that ensues for years to come. But ultimately, after many (many) pardon emails, I chose to take the learning opportunity. I definitely don’t expect anyone to attend if I do end up down the aisle in the future. And I now know to put far more thought into that sort of commitment before getting my friends and family involved.
But we were also paying for the event out of our own pockets. Aside from the endless apologies we offer to our loved ones now until forever, there wasn’t one poor sap stuck with our unclaimed bill.
In the end, it sounds like this guy finally realized he raised a brat who had no consideration for the gifts that were being handed to her, and he acted out. Therefore, was dipping out on his baby’s special day the “wrong” move? Maybe yes and no. Yes, he was right in (finally) choosing to show her the value of finances, gratitude, and moving through life with grace, if not tact. Also, motorbikes are fun. As the Gen Z baddies would say (far too often, I might add): “I love this for you.”
But his method of teaching was not too tasteful. If we circle back to the previous point, He raised her and, it seems, instilled some pretty questionable values. Therefore, instead of facing the problem he (technically) created, he dipped out and left his child to her own devices. Albeit for something arguably more enjoyable and personally rewarding, yeah.
Clearly, I’m still on the fence here. But I don’t have kids. And I don’t like c*nts. I digress. As a parent, don’t you want to teach your offspring that they reap what they sow? Well, this was a moment of reaping, and alternatively, he ran (or rode) away…like a bitch. She’s no queen either, which I think we all gathered by her “revenge photos” comment.
If life were fair, they would have both learned a lesson. She’d learn that when you’re not a humble receiver, you stop receiving. And he’d absorb the idea that your children are the direct product of your input. Considering that we are aware of this very publicly aired dirty laundry from a social post, I gather that at least the father is stuck in a loop of poor choices. And again, [warning: bookend] life is about choices, right?
So, we ask once more: Was this father right for taking a motorcycle trip in lieu of his princess’ second try at matrimony? The jury is still out. Was it tasteless for him to reach out to the Reddit community to validate his decisions instead of having a heart-to-heart with his own flesh and blood (repairing the relationship instead of further decimating it and traumatizing his kid)? Solid yes.
My conclusion, should you care: If you are tired of your brat’s bullshit and choose not to support their milestones, that’s on you. But own it. And don’t come crying to the rest of us when someone calls you out on it. Have some fucking dignity.
Well, now you know what I think. But what do you think?
