So the children missed Doctor Who because of Germany, apparently it was awesome & I know there is iPlayer but Nancy likes to live-tweet her followers? Dave went, well you can live-tweet our historicvisit to Schloss Meseberg instead, so within seconds Angela was going "please vot is the meaning of this LAME", and Joachim was going "vot means epic sausage FAIL"? Dave's like, who knew they were on Twitter? So I was like, haha, you know kids, oh you don't, well it is like "sick", what Nancy actually means is, yay, this is like being in The Sound of Music before they escape?
Well not that I would have dreamed of complaining but we never give the children processed meat, so I had to say it was pork allergies, & it was school practically the next day & so Dave had Elwen's motte and bailey castle to do plus I should have been looking for a hat for Wednesday, total joke in this freezing little Schloss in the land that fash forgot :( I said to Mummy, people say Chippy is useless for clothes, trust me, compared with Germany it is literally Paris, and no, we did not discuss OKA's new heirloom pieces, Joachim was only interested in the impact of imperialism on Granta's Best of Young British *shudders with PTSD*.
So at least we picked up some German, eg Joachim sweetly taught me German for OMG, which is "das ist Agonie" & I think they defo learned more about the British way of life? Eg Angela could not believe we change bags every season, apparently Germans use the same one for EVER & personalised stationery is literally a foreign country to them, I'm like, Angela, seriously no offence to your tragic communist past but that is the saddest thing I have EVER heard, getting their first set of luxe correspondence cards is a key rite of passage for British teens, but a flagship Smythson store in Berlin would be an important Anglo-German statement that solved both problems overnight?
And Nancy was just starting her thank you letter when we heard they are not coming to the funeral? I said to Dave, if that is the German idea of gratitude no way are we returning that bathrobe.
