Well, here's one in the eye for those industry snobs who sneered that Victoria Beckham couldn't even get arrested in Hollywood.
Technically, of course, getting pulled over by a member of the California Highway Patrol doesn't count as an arrest. But it certainly does in Lost in Showbiz's livelier daydreams, and I see no reason why these transgressive fantasies should not be formally adopted as the standard for what constitutes illegal behaviour on the LA freeways.
I've no idea what happened in the minutes after this event, though I'll certainly be indulging in some spicy conjecture in Lost in Showbiz After Hours- the adult version of this column, accessible to password holders only. But after detailed study of the deluge of news reports surrounding its publication, we can piece together what went before.
It seems that Mrs Beckham was having a driving lesson in her new hometown, when she made an illegal right turn in her Cadillac Escalade (a vehicular choice of spirit-crushing inevitability). Immediately, she was flagged down by a traffic cop, who asked to see her licence. The leather- booted officer soon discovered that his lady perp was a stranger round these parts, and took it upon himself to escort her to the city's Department of Motor Vehicles to register the car - minivan, is it? - and apply for a Californian driving licence.
"It was all a bit embarrassing, but luckily no charges were brought against her," a source told yesterday's Mirror, "and it'll make great material for the TV show."
Ah yes. I ought to have mentioned that the entire kerfuffle was captured by cameras tailing Victoria for her new reality show, in one of those strange instances of Jungian synchronicity which have long attended her career.
