Former Geordie Shore babe Vicky Pattison has opened up about feeling 'lost and scared' after the Christmas break in a very honest Instagram post.
The reality star, 34, told her 4.9million followers she was determined to start the New Year feeling 'productive, excited and so ready for everything' - but in fact she felt quite the opposite.
In her truthful message shared on her social media page, Vicky said: "I thought I was going to wake up today & everything was just going to fall in to place... I was going to be Mrs 2022- feel productive, excited & so ready for everything this next 365 days of endless possibilities had to offer.. But I didn't."
The I'm A Celebrity winner added she would usually start off a fresh year by writing down her goals and plans, but revealed she wasn't feeling normal following the effect the pandemic has had over the last two years.
Vicky continued: "Instead I just feel really lost, abit scared & not like myself at all. Normally at this time of year I'm furiously writing down my goals & objectives, constructing an elaborate vision board & painstakingly planning the next 12 months.. but this isn't a normal year is it?!
"It hasn't been a normal couple of years & I think it's about time we all stopped pushing ourselves to 'be ok' & 'be normal' & do as we normally would & instead just understand the magnitude of what we've all been through & allow ourselves a bit of a break."
She continued: "We all put so much pressure on ourselves to make Christmas perfect after feeling like so much was taken from us last year & now that all the hype is over & the decs are down- & we have to face a world that still doesn't look how we want it to- it's easy to feel abit empty.
"Like many people right now, I think I'm struggling with abit of post pandemic stress disorder.. I'm irritable, anxious, can easily become consumed in negative thoughts & have lost interest in pastimes & things that I usually really love doing.
"The urge to keep this to myself, pop on some gym gear and jump on Instagram with some quote about this year being 'my year'- acting like everything was fine was almost too strong. Don't get me wrong, I'll get there.. & I'll be back to the Lycra clad, quote posting, juice cleanse loving arsehole that you guys all know & love in no time.. but until then, I just wanted to reassure anyone else out there who's not quite there yet, not on board the 'new year, new me' train, who's taking a little bit longer to get into the swing of things this jan... That it's ok."
She signed off her post with: "After everything we've all been through & are still going through- it is ok to need a little more time & to feel abit nervous about this year.
"Be kind to yourself, don't get sucked in to the insta trap, we haven't all got it figured out & we don't all think this year is going to me 'our year' yet & that's ok. We'll get there."
Vicky's celebrity pals commented on her post, sending their love and support.
"You definitely aren’t alone. Sending love xxx," Emily Atack wrote.
Becky Vardy left a string of love hearts and Helen Flanagan penned: "Lovely girl."
It comes after the social media star, who has a huge following, insisted she will "always be honest" with her Instagram feed.
“I always endeavour to be super honest on Instagram because I feel like if you have that platform and you’re not using it responsibly, what is the point?” she said.
“So that includes the good days; the ‘Oh my God, please check out my new Pour Moi collection’, the ‘Oh my God, I’m in a new TV show’ and the ‘Oh my God, aren’t I gorgeous in this bikini?’
“But I’ll also post the ‘Oh my God, I’m on my period today and I feel rubbish, so I’m just gonna eat this entire pie’.
“Or the ‘Oh my God, I’m having a breakout and I don’t feel comfortable in my own skin today’.”
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