The perfect marriage proposal is one that’s thoughtful and genuine. However, content creator Jordan Hardman has recently made people from all over the world realize there’s one more crucial element to it.
Last month, she released a video explaining the importance of the pose in which someone gets on their knee. “I don’t want no ‘Pwease mawy me,'” Jordan said, showing a bad example of the action, which she dubbed the Hunchback of Notre Dame, before revealing what she believes to be the right way to go about it.
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A proposal is one of those things that the couple remembers for the rest of their marriage
Image credits: Jonathan Borba / Pexels (not the actual photo)
So this woman issued a PSA to everyone planning it, highlighting the pose that she thinks they should avoid
“This might be a very niche ick and I understand that, but if my man proposes and he does this, I’m [angry], I’m [fricking angry].”
Image credits: jordyyhard
“And I’ve seen this and I clock it, I just notice it. Maybe it’s just a me thing.”
Image credits: jordyyhard
“When they’re about to get down or are getting down, and you look back at the pictures, and the Hunchback of Notre Dame doesn’t know how to get on their knees. Like this. I’ve seen so many.”
Image credits: jordyyhard
“90 degrees, this should be straight. I don’t want no ‘Pwease mawy me.’ Stand [the frick] up.”
Image credits: jordyyhard
“I know that is niche, but I swear to God, if I post a picture and my man’s doing one of these, I’m [angry].”
Jordan’s video has already been viewed over 8 million times
@jordyyhard♬ original sound – jordyyhard
While good posture might be important to some, we can take a look at a 2022 study published in the Journal of Family Psychology to fully understand what makes for a great proposal.
“The typical Western … proposal involves kneeling, offering a ring, and asking some variant of ‘will you marry me?'” says Lisa Hoplock, the lead author of the study, after analyzing 374 accepted and declined marriage offers.
“The proposal is often a surprise. What my research reveals is that while certain details can be a welcome surprise, the timing of the proposal in the relationship shouldn’t be a surprise. That is, couples should be on the same page about when and if they want to get married.”
Image credits: Jesus Arias / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The study discovered that:
- Couples who experienced accepted proposals were more likely to talk about marriage before it and the proposals tended to occur later in the relationship;
- In rejected proposals, the proposer often assumed that they were on the same page as their partner, or they proposed to save the relationship (e.g., they had broken up or were fighting and the proposal was an attempt to make things better);
- Accepted proposals were more likely to have a ring than the rejected ones;
- Accepted proposals were more likely to take place in private.
Expanding on these results, Hoplock suggests that a great proposal consists of three key elements:
- No surprises. If the person being proposed to is put on the spot with no prior discussion about marriage, they are more likely to give a negative answer;
- A rock. Proposing with a ring increases the chances of them saying ‘yes.’ It shows that one has put thought, effort, and resources into the plan;
- An intimate setting. Asking your partner to marry you in front of other people can put a lot of unnecessary pressure on them. A private proposal, on the other hand, can give them the space they need to give a sincere and honest answer.
And maybe a straight back?
People had a lot to say about Jordan’s ick
