You got there, you reached the finish line and somehow the big day is finally here.
After navigating your way through the chaos of December with Christmas jumpers to buy, raffle prizes to donate and spending a month's wages on 'magical' festive events that turned out to be anything but, it's time to enjoy the day itself.
Or at least try to.
Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas, it's up there as one of my favourite times of the year, but there's no getting away from the fact that once you've got kids, it's hard work.
And it usually goes a bit like this...
The build-up
There's no other word for it than intense. There's so much pressure to make it the most magical time for kids that if you're not #makingmemories on a Santa train, or the kids aren't #livingtheirbestlife in Lapland, you can end up feeling like a bit of a failure.
You're not.
Most parents are tearing their hair out just trying to think of something new to do with 'that bloody elf' they wish was #livinghisownbleedinlife in Lapland.
You've had Santa on speed dial for the last two months and now the Christmas is finally arriving, you're wondering if he'll still be available after the 25th. There's always voicemail.
Christmas Eve
Oooo the time to really get festive eh.
Well yes, but have you got everything? There must be something you've forgotten right.
Oh yes, but don't worry, you won't remember what it is until the shops have closed and it's too late and you need to get the house set up and start preparing for Christmas dinner and make it a 'magical' Christmas Eve with movies and matching pjs and put some treats out for Santa and Rudolph and make sure the kids get an early night - yes, good luck with that!
This is usually the point when your children announce what they do indeed now 'actually really want for Christmas' - something that was on their mental list, not their actual list of course - but 'Santa knows everything anyway', so all's good right?
Christmas morning
'It's 3am kids, I don't think so'.
The real Christmas morning
You've accepted that there are two 5.30s in the day and after already sending the kids back to bed four times, you give in and guess what, 'he's been!'.
Oh wasn't Santa so good staying so long to not only deliver the bike, but build it too. What a guy!
He must have been there a while as he drank half that bottle of brandy that was left out.
Time for mum to get the bin bags out for all that wrapping paper, while dad's getting tetchy that the recycling bins are already full and not getting emptied till a week on Thursday.
Ah well, even more reason to keep hold of that giant cardboard box that seems to be keeping the children entertained - unlike their new toys!
The Christmas wobble
I don't mean the wobble mum has every Christmas when she's 'the one left TO DO EVERYTHING' and ends up screaming at dad to buy his own mum's present.
No, this is the official Christmas Day wobble. When, after being up for what feels like an eternity and coming down from a sugar-fuelled breakfast of sweets and chocolate, the kids begin to get cranky.
They can't agree on what to play, they can't agree on what to do. The youngest starts playing with the older one's new toy and before you know it all hell breaks loose.
'Let's open this bad boy' suggests dad, screwdriver in hand, before realising it would be easier to break into a car showroom to get his hands on an actual Ferrari, than it is to smash his way through the layers of plastic encasing this one.
He's finally done it, the beast is released. Ah but, wait a minute, 'needs 2x CR2 batteries for car and 3xAA for controller'. Cue the mother of all tantrums. And that's just dad.
Never mind, the shops will be open in a couple of days.
Stick some Christmas TV on and job's a good'un - as long as they can agree on what to watch that is.
Christmas dinner
It's been lovingly prepared for hours - turkey and all the trimmings ready for the taking.
Do the kids want it? Of course they don't.
They've been filling their faces with Haribo for the last three hours and managed to prize open the tin of Quality Street when they were watching The Snowman when you weren't looking.
They might have a bit of mash and some pigs in blankets if you're lucky. Ah well, choose your battles and all that, it's Christmas after all.
And it comes with one big consolation - 'bye bye elf, see you next year' - or hopefully not.
Who let them travel here during a pandemic anyway?
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