Former London trolleybus driver Charlie Wyatt:
One of our conductors was nicknamed Bonar Colleano Junior because he looked like an American actor who appeared in British films in the early 1950s. Shortly before his wedding, he and his fiancee agreed that once they were married they would live in Holloway. She lived in Barnet and he, being a resourceful man, came up with the idea of using London Transport as a removal firm. This was when the staff bus duties were on the main rota and moving house by trolleybus was going to be achieved when he was working duty one.
He had it all mapped out. It was the custom for those who finished work before the staff bus left the depot, and who wanted to travel towards East Finchley and beyond, to travel with it up to Barnet and back. It was better to chat with your colleagues than hang around in the depot for a time. This particular week, those planning to travel on the staff bus were unaware that they were going to be roped in as removal men.
"Bonar Colleano" made arrangements that the items to be transported were brought to Barnet terminus each night. The bus was in at 12.48 a.m. and 12.49, so there was only one minute loading time. Even though the staff on board helped, it took longer than a minute and the bus left late. Who was to know? There weren't going to be any inspectors about at that time in the morning.
Meanwhile, down at Holloway, the other members of the plot were waiting and along with the remaining members of staff on board, unloaded the items. This all took some nights to complete as only the downstairs of the trolleybus could be used. Carpets, chairs, a bed and various domestic items were transported. "Bonar Colleano" left his jewel in the crown until last and when the staff turned up on the final night of his seven day shift, there was a wardrobe waiting to be loaded.
The crew, two members of staff and "Bonar Colleano" all attempted to get it into the lower saloon, but try as they might it would not go in and they were left with no choice but to stand it on the platform. This was precarious, and to ensure that London Transport wouldn't have to investigate a wardrobe falling off a trolleybus travelling down Barnet Hill at one o'clock in the morning, three of those on board had to hold on to it to ensure that it did not fall off. Whatever the couple of regular passengers thought of these carryings-on beggars belief.
From Beneath the Wires of London: Driving and Conducting London Trolleybuses. Have a wardrobe-free Bank Holiday weekend.
