THE GOAL
I have no goal. And that, apparently, is a problem. I started running last year, after eight years of doing no exercise other than drag small children round by their ears (good for the forearms, releases tension). I like running. I'm slow and don't run very far, but I enjoy my varying routes round the park and I love the mad post-run serotonin rush. I do it for the high: all other benefits are secondary.
But, with sport, as with most things in life these days, you are meant to have a Goal. What are you aiming for? What is your motivation? A hangover-free buzz is not enough. I'm wary of fitness goals, as I used to be a competitive person. Being competitive at sport when you're not an athlete and way past 40 is a very bad idea: I worry I'll think I'm Usain Bolt and sprint myself to a heart attack. So, I have been running without timing my runs, without knowing how far I've gone. I'm deliberately Goal-averse.
Still, when my editor said, "Why don't you run a race?", I said, OK, and signed up for a 10k. I had no idea how far I'd run before I did this; I just knew a marathon was out of the question. I picked the Bupa 10k because the route was glamorous: start on the Mall, finish in front of Buckingham Palace, loads of other people to look at if you get bored of the scenery. Plus: Mo Farah!
THE METHOD
For a more organised person than me, this section would consist of a eight-week programme of carefully increased timed runs, cross-training and rest days. Instead, I sporadically tried out a few running apps; I hated pretty much all of them. The Nike app suggested that I told Facebook I was going on a run, and then when a friend "liked" my status, I would hear a cheer in your ear! Can you imagine! And the Adidas one was voiced by a mate, which was just too weird.
The only apps I liked were Zombies, Run! and RunKeeper. Zombies, Run! has a 5k option, devised by experts, structured training, blah blah, which I didn't bother with. Instead, I went for the story version. Every time you go for a run, you hear a chapter of the story (devastated world, zombies everywhere, only a few humans left, including you). You are Runner No 5 and it's like you're in a computer game: as you run, a disembodied voice says you've picked up some medical equipment or some food. Then there's the "drama" bits, in which the story unfolds. Best of all, at certain points the Zombies chase you, so you have to sprint. It's a right laugh.
RunKeeper is more straightforward. It just tells you how far you've run, how high, gives you a map of your route and whether you've gone any faster than before. It's good because it's unfussy, its satnav is accurate and quick and, as you run, it tells you –not too often – how many miles you've covered.
I also tried a TomTom watch-type thing called a Multi-Sport, which initially got me into a frenzy because it takes a long time to get itself ready for you to run. But once I got used to that, I ended up liking it because it's very reliable. It doesn't talk to you, it's just giving you the time, how many calories you've burnt (yuk), or how far you've managed to get. If you have a goal, the Multi-Sport is happy to help you get there, by the way; there's a website where you can plot your progress, tell your mates, do all the social stuff I hate. Also, you can use the Multi-Sport for cycling and – even better – swimming, where mobile phones are useless.
THE RESULT
You know what, you don't need any of this stuff for a 10k. You just need to run really, really slowly and drink a lot of water. Before I did the 10k, the furthest I'd ever run in my life was just under 5k. I ran the 10k with two friends who were experienced runners, who were kind enough to slow down to my snail's pace and we chatted all the way round. And I didn't stop! I didn't even walk!
Mo Farah was there, doing his arm-heart thing as we moved slowly off along the Mall. There was lots of music along the way – brass bands, bongo drums, some awful DJs – which was entertaining in a don't-laugh-you'll-be-sick way.
The route was great, a highlights of London trip, with no traffic. Overall, the atmosphere was like a festival: queuing for Portaloos, massing of people in a park, terrible joke outfits, general geniality. I was in the last 10% when it came to time. But I did it. I got a medal and everything.
If you run a little bit – two miles per run, every week or so – then a 10k is definitely within your reach. Run with mates; they're the gadget. Still, if I could, I would keep the Multi-Sport watch. The more I run, the more I like running without listening to anything. Not music (makes me run too fast), not Zombies, Run! or the Freakonomics podcast (though I still do at least one run a week listening to one of those). I enjoy running without artificial extras, just letting the pad-pad-pad of my feet and the pumping of my blood lull my chattering mind into a sort of high-energy, wakeful doze. You sort out all your head-rubbish while running.
And when you get home, you plug in your watch or phone to your computer and your efforts are recorded. Ignore those records, obsess over them: it's up to you. TomTom Multi-Sport or RunKeeper, those are my recommendations, whether you're goal-less or going for gold.
