When I turn left out of the hotel where I often stay in Manchester, I pass a patch of derelict land next to a pub. Written large on the wall of this establishment is some street art. The legend reads: “ON THE SIXTH DAY GOD CREATED MANCHESTER”.
Now, I don’t think he did, but that is not my issue. While I acknowledge that the artist’s tongue may have been in his or her cheek, it is the self-love that does my head in. I really like the city and the people. And, as much as I am qualified to say what is cool and what isn’t, they are both pretty cool, too. But cool people surely know that the most uncool thing in the world is bigging oneself up.
Most cities and regions do this to some extent, but Manchester is right up there with Yorkshire on this one. Again, a genuinely wonderful part of the world, urban and rural – but do stop telling us, please. How many times have you heard someone from Yorkshire say, as though they are paying themselves the biggest compliment ever, that they are “Yorkshire through and through”? Meaning what exactly? If a bloke walks into a room and says: “Hey, everyone, I’m really brilliant,” everyone in the room rolls their eyes. So why would banging on about a place be any different?
For this reason, I won’t bang on about my city, Birmingham, other than to say that what is so great about us is that we never bang on about how great we are.
For many years, there was a luminously brilliant website that promoted the second city. Do look it up. It is called birminghamitsnotshit.co.uk.
That is as much as we are prepared to say in our own favour – and that is what makes us the greatest city on God’s green Earth.
•Adrian Chiles is a writer, broadcaster and Guardian columnist
