The X Factor feels pointless
Call off the dogs. End the hunt. I have finally realised why I feel awkward and a bit numb while watching The X Factor (Saturday, Sunday, ITV1). It’s because there’s no order to the episodes. All the footage is culled from all the audition rounds in one go and then sprinkled randomly across the weeks as we wait for the live shows to start. There’s no reason why this weekend’s programme couldn’t have been aired last weekend or couldn’t be aired next weekend. There’s just no point to any of it. Other than this: “Here are some people who auditioned and who did or didn’t go through to boot camp.” It’s lazy. There’s no narrative. Why should we be invested? It used to be that the audition process allowed some kind of rivalry or camaraderie to build up between the judges (other than bonding over their handbag dogs). Or we would at least get a feel for the length of the audition process (“this week we’re in Manchester”) and a sense that time was running out for the contestants (“if you failed in Manchester, you could still try in London”). Now it’s just filling airtime. Come on, Uncle Simon, hurry up and start the live shows before too many of us lose the will to live…
You would not want David Thewlis to call on you in the dead of night
“Please, sir, an inspector’s called…” After last week’s Lady Chatterley’s Lover, the Classics season continued with An Inspector Calls (Sunday, BBC1). With Ken Stott, Miranda Richardson and the utterly chilling David Thewlis, this had to be a no-brainer, didn’t it? And with the Corbynite themes of unions, workers’ rights and nasty, nasty capitalists sacking people and drinking too much port, it felt timely, relevant and clever. The performances were nuanced and understated, the coolly calculating tone of the inspector (Thewlis) contrasting with the psychological unravelling of the dinner party guests. True to the original text, the political point-scoring was not subtly done but it was effective and memorable. “What is all this if you don’t really want to help?” “We’ve made our decision.” An excellent adaptation.
Gogglebox is back and better than ever
Gogglebox (Friday, Channel 4) is back! Hard to believe it’s on series six. An unashamed, out-and-proud Gogglebox addict, even I had a few quibbles about the last series. I know it’s all staged. But that fact needs to be kept out of sight, out of mind so that we can enjoy it. The last series failed to cover up the fakery. Things seemed to have improved this time round. And this was a vintage episode. It was also far and away the best way to watch The X Factor. (“Get in there, girl!”) Or find out about Syria. Listen to June, Europe! “They really need a crisis meeting where they decide what to do.” Scarlett was on fire tonight. On Lady Chatterley’s Lover: “They can’t really show cock and balls on a BBC drama, though, can they?” On Bake-Off: “I care more about some of these people than I care about my own family.” Best quote, though, came from Umar Siddiqui about Time Crashers: “If it was really realistic, they’d give them TB and syphilis.”
No-one looked good in 1990
“They look like they need a bloody good wash, a good sleep and an ‘aircut.” This was not an inaccurate description of Oasis and The Stone Roses. Or of many of the characters in This is England ’90 (Sunday, Channel 4). Although this series is obviously fictional, it feels like a real-life Gogglebox. It’s worth watching this for the ridiculous hairstyles and dodgy moustaches alone, brilliantly capturing a terrible sartorial period in England’s history. But there’s so much to admire here: great dialogue, wonderfully sneery characters and a hilarious authenticity that really captures the (hugely embarrassing) 1990s. You get more out of it the more you know Shane Meadows’ work. But this is essential viewing for anyone who misses Shameless or The Royle Family.
