Why do people speak so much louder on their mobiles than face to face?
Because they can’t see their listener and, unfortunately, themselves.
Richard Orlando, Westmount, Quebec, Canada
• You do not need to speak loudly when you are face to face.
Philip Stigger, Burnaby, British Columbia, Canada
• Presumably because a mobile has no face, and therefore no ears.
Jennifer Horat, Lengwil, Switzerland
• To annoy fellow diners.
Jim Neilan, Dunedin, New Zealand
• Because the person to whom they are speaking is much further away.
David Teather, Canberra, Australia
• They’re calling for attention.
David Tucker, Halle, Germany
• A heard mentality takes over.
Jim Dewar, Gosford, NSW, Australia
Happiness is ... N&Q
What’s required to be the world’s most fortunate person? Who is it?
It takes more bluff than a bantam cock, more luck than a leprechaun and more face than Facebook. Who other than Vladimir Putin can claim that crown? If he were anywhere other than Russia, he’d be laughed off stage.
Noel Bird, Boreen Point, Queensland, Australia
• It’s the leprechaun who is dancing a jig because he’s sufficiently deluded (or quite possibly inebriated on fine stout) to believe that the four-leaved Trifolium that he has just found is anything but a rare hiccough in nature’s wonderful order.
Stuart Williams, Kampala, Uganda
• Fortunate in the sense of owning a fortune? It surely makes a difference whether you are a sultan or the evil Murdoch!
Edward Black, Sydney, Australia
• To get one’s answer into Notes & Queries. It’ll be me if you publish this answer.
David Isaacs, Sydney, Australia
The list goes on and on
If you were word master, what words would you outlaw?
Dis and Dat.
R De Braganza, Kilifi, Kenya
• It would be, like, awesome, if both could be, like, banned ... yeah!
Norman Ledgerwood, Dunedin, New Zealand
• I’d ban all extra-grammatical uses of gender and settle for the plainer three-letter word.
Nicholas Albrecht, Paris, France
• I would like to outlaw the use of “so”. At least in my homeland, this would instantly render speechless the entire social and cultural commentariat.
Ade Peace, Eden Hills, South Australia
Lead and read, so they said
If speech is silver and silence golden, what is texting?
Texting is read.
Doreen Forney, Pownal, Vermont, US
• Lead.
John Ralston, Mountain View, California, US
Scum: it sinks before it rises
Is it the cream or the scum that rises to the top?
In milk the cream is the scum – it rises to the top but it contains unhealthy saturated fat. In life the scum often sinks to the worst possible actions to rise to the top.
Pat Phillips, Adelaide, South Australia, Australia
• Most of the time it’s the scum who feed off the cream while rising to the top jobs.
Gillian Shenfield, Sydney, Australia
Forget gravy. Get saucy
Where do I buy my ticker to the gravy train? Sorry, you just missed it. But don’t get into a stew. There’s lots more fun to be had in the sauce boat!
Guy Johnston, Kirchhundem, Germany
Any answers?
What else could luck be other than a lady?
R De Braganza, Kilifi, Kenya
Why is it always the colonels who stage the coup?
Terence Rowell, Dartmouth, Nova Scotia, Canada
• Send answers to weekly.nandq@theguardian.com or Guardian Weekly, Kings Place, 90 York Way, London N1 9GU, UK
