Horny confusion levels on the internet have reached an all-time high after the trailer for Wicker dropped.
In case you’ve been off the internet, people are buzzing over Wicker, a fantasy rom-com that’s set to weave into our theatres sometime this year.
The movie, by Aussie-born Eleanor Wilson and Alex Huston Fischer, is an adaptation of Ursula Wills-Jones‘ 2008 short story, The Wicker Husband, that follows a single fisherwoman (Olivia Colman) who asks a basketmaker (Peter Dinklage) to weave her a husband out of wicker after being teased for being partnerless in a village where marriage tends to be the norm.
When her Wicker Husband (played by the one and only Alexander Skarsgård) comes to life and exceeds all expectations of a perfect partner (including the sex, which we will get into in a sec), her fellow villagers grow jealous, leading to some major mischief and debauchery.
Take a peek below at the Wicker trailer (warning, there’s a bit of ~passionate moments~ in there, just in case you need headphones):
The internet reacts to Alexander Skarsgård as the Wicker Husband in Wicker
While the story appears to explore the very important and relevant themes of loneliness, belonging, relationships, conformity and jealousy, fans are only thinking about one thing: the wicker peen.
This includes how hot the Wicker Husband is, what the peen looks like, and concerns over splinters… That’s the internet for you.
Just saw that Wicker trailer…. pic.twitter.com/BWtzWkazwW
— Dai 🧚🏽♀️ (@ThatsForAIITime) July 31, 2026
Show of hands, who very much wants to see the Wicker husband’s dick to see what all that is about???? I’m curious about the logistics. pic.twitter.com/R8THTBDruL
— Witch’s Brew (@HollyyLeighanne) July 31, 2026
I find myself pondering the wicker penis every once in a while. I don’t know what the rules are of building a real man out of wicker. They used to make dildos out of polished wood and stone. I’m thrown off by the wicker man being so sexual. https://t.co/6rhcY07HMi
— 💕 (@janicesghost) August 1, 2026
I can't stop thinking about that wicker weiner pic.twitter.com/Kgb4d80iJB
— una or angstblaster300 (@Qqqqufff) August 2, 2026
the wicker guy kind of sexy as fuck i fear
— p✨ (@profdekarios) August 1, 2026
Scrolling my TL and I’m very happy to see all of my degenerate mutuals all agree that we wanna fuck a wicker basket man. Welcome back 2023 twt pic.twitter.com/KfjgfRhnL8
— Kay 💞 | Budding Misandrist (@kaylalynette__) July 31, 2026
yea I’m fuckin the wicker man
— ☆ (@stxrdusted) August 2, 2026
Do we think the wicker dick is cut or uncut? This is a fishing village in the UK after all pic.twitter.com/61khFEgdEw
— Meech (@MediumSizeMeech) August 1, 2026
If you’re curious about how they brought the Wicker Husband to life, Fischer and Wilson revealed to Entertainment Weekly that Skarsgård was wearing a wicker suit.
“My dream was always to have nipples made out of wicker. Thanks to our wonderful directors, Eleanor and Alex, and the brilliant artists at Wētā in New Zealand, my dream has finally come true,” Skarsgård told EW.
At the time of writing, we’ve yet to gain any knowledge regarding the wicker peen specifically, BUT if I ever bump into the directors, Coleman, Skarsgård or Dinklage, I know exactly what I’m asking… #bootsonthegroundjournalism.
Wicker will premiere Down Under at the Melbourne International Film Festival (MIFF) on August 6.
The post The Wicker Trailer Has The Internet Buzzing About One Thing: A Wicker Weiner appeared first on PEDESTRIAN.TV .