I implore you to make a will right now. You never know when you'll die - and if you die without a will, you will 100 per cent leave chaos behind. I'm just in the middle of an argument with a mate whose last will was written before her divorce was finalised some 15 years ago. That will leaves everything to her now very ex-husband.
When I had a chat with her about it, she basically said: "Nah, it will be fine. He'll give the money to the kids."
It's true, this bloke is very lovely. But a will is a will - and you never know what hell will descend in the wake of a wake. We've seen time and time again the mayhem grief causes, the mayhem greed causes. About 20 per cent of us don't even plan to make a will. It's wild. That means others are left behind to clean up the mess of your estate.
Here's one tragic example. Businessman Andrew Findlay died in a boating accident in 2024. His former partner contested the will last year but a Supreme Court judge ruled Findlay's multimillion-dollar estate will be inherited by his three children and not their mother.
Investment management company JB Were estimates total inheritances between 2024 and 2044 to be about $5.4 trillion, up from the 2017 estimates by the Productivity Commission of $3.5 trillion over two decades.
And who gets those inheritances? Mostly our partners if still in a couple or our kids. Then a further small per cent goes to other family and friends. There's a push on now to consider leaving bequests to not-for-profits.
Mind you, I'm only recently one to be able to give advice about making wills. In 2020, my mother-in-law died in the middle of COVID. She left her will in perfect order. Her seven children would share everything equally. And that's how it worked out. They didn't argue or bicker or fall out with each other. They just got on with it. Extremely grown up,
Her death was a swift reminder to me that I better get my ideas in order. Yes, a will existed but it described our children as small infants who needed care and maintenance and had no agency of their own. Which would have been a surprise to three adults who'd been sorting themselves out for quite some time. Now it's a clear instruction to divvy it all up equally and get on with it.
I've been a beneficiary of a will on a couple of occasions. A very wealthy friend left me 20 grand. I had no idea it was coming and honestly, with three teenagers, it could not have come at a better time. It was a surprise to me and a surprise to her husband - but he didn't contest it. The other time was not so clear - and one of the other beneficiaries of the will was not pleased I was on the list. It all turned out as the will writer intended but it caused heartache along the way.
I asked Prue Vines, professor in the faculty of law at UNSW, if she had advice. Of course she did.
Get a professional to do it. Sure, it seems like a lot of money at the outset - but my goodness it can save a lot of money at the end. Your end, I mean.
Now, Australians have, on the whole, been pretty good will makers. That came about because Australians, on the whole, have been reliable home owners. Not that I remember this myself from back in 1984 when we bought our first place. Vines says it used to be a conversation that whoever did your conveyancing also advised you to make a will. It was standard, she says. God knows whether our rates of will making will plunge at the same speed as our rates of home ownership are plunging. More than half of us have made a will
But yeah, don't do it yourself, says Vines. Is that because we don't know what we are doing?
Not exactly. It's more like we don't want to think about death in the first place. And we certainly don't want to think about the death of anyone we love. That means we don't deal with the possibilities. What happens if both you and your partner die at once? Vines says a good lawyer will help you deal with the "what ifs", a sure fire way to avoid further financial costs.
This all makes sense - but it's what she says next that is truly confronting. Discuss your will with your prospective beneficiaries - be clear and concise. Vines says this advice has changed over the years - but she recommends communicating as a way of avoiding disputes. Let people know what's coming.
"You'd have a 60 year old opening up Mum's will for the first time," she says. That led to the discovery that one child would be getting more than the other. Why? "Because Johnny hasn't done that well and [he needs] more than the others."
She says the conversation beforehand could go something along the lines of: "You've done really well, and so I don't think you don't need as much [as Johnny] so I'm actually giving more to him."
"Give them time to respond, to be angry," says Vines.
If you have the chat beforehand, you can avoid getting into litigation while you are still in grief.
"It's a good rule of thumb," she says.
It will be awkward because all conversations about money are awkward. It will be uncomfortable because all conversations about death are awkward. But it will save everyone time and grief. Get the arguments out of the way while you are still alive to adjudicate them.
