As Barack Obama roams fearlessly across Alaska and prepares to guest-star on adventure show Running Wild with Bear Grylls, the time is surely right for other politicians to broaden their appeal with high-stakes appearances across the gamut of reality TV shows.
The possibilities are endless – due not only to the abundance of reality shows on cable TV but also to the rather large number of presidential candidates plying their trade at the moment. Here are a few ideas.
Lindsey Graham: The Bachelor
The famously single South Carolina senator has said that if elected President there would be “a rotating first lady”, which seems like a lot of work for the Secret Service and a possible distraction from more national affairs.
Rick Perry: Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?
Bring back this educational program and get the answer once and for all.
Ben Carson: I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant
The doctor and pro-life GOP presidential candidate has a proud record of ignorance regarding issues related to women’s reproductive rights.
Joe Biden: Top Gear
Even if the VP is not the Trans Am-rocking badass imagined by the Onion, doing donuts on the White House lawn, he still has a zestful glee that would translate well to this recently recast BBC motoring show.
Chris Christie: Man vs Food
The New Jersey governor famously spent $82,000 on snacks and concessions while watching NFL games at Met Life Stadium. Excellent practice for a winning appearance on this hedonistic food competition.
Bernie Sanders: Treehouse Masters
Feel the Bern all the way from the peace and tranquility of a wooded glen in Vermont’s wild and verdant Northern Kingdom.
John Boehner: Bar Rescue
The Speaker of the House famously started working at his family’s bar in Ohio at the age of eight. In 2015 it was revealed that a bartender at his country club was plotting to poison his drinks. Sounds like a job for Jon Taffer.
Rand Paul: Big Brother
Due to the Senator’s stated hatred of state surveillance, he might have some difficulty in this camera-rigged fishbowl – but if he has nothing to hide, he has nothing to fear.
Donald Trump: Mythbusters
The Mythbusters, who have tested and exposed everything from internet hoaxes to old wives’ tales, may find they have met their match when faced with the business mogul’s seemingly endless stream of startling rhetoric.
Scott Walker: American Chopper
Walker, who rides a 2003 Harley-Davidson Road King and governs the motorcycle maker’s home state, seeks votes and fellowship with nothing more than a leather jacket, the open road and a (controversial) helmet.
Mike Huckabee: Lip Sync Battle
The perfect showcase for the former Arkansas governor’s dulcet drawl.
Bobby Jindal: Duck Dynasty
Based on the large overlap between the politics of the Louisiana governor and those of these wealthy, bearded culture warriors – who have endorsed Jindal – it would be unlikely either would lose any followers by climbing into a duck blind to blast a few out of the sky.
Carly Fiorina: Undercover Boss
This pairing could produce serious drama. Fiorina – the former CEO of Hewlet-Packard – returns to the company she once led as a low-level employee, only to rise again to the top spot, where she promptly fires every person she met along the way, including herself, thereby excising the whole debacle from the timeline (or creating a paradox that destroys the universe).
John Kasich: Wipeout
This would just make for excellent, must-see TV.
