The Trailer For Magic Mike 3 Just Dropped So Allow Me, A Lesbian, To Break It Down For You

In news that will absolutely make your week, we’ve copped the trailer for Magic Mike’s Last Dance. That’s right m’dears: our first proper glance into the third instalment of arguably one of the world’s greatest franchises. It’s time we all accept Channing Tatum

Salma Hayek Pinault Magic Mike Reid Carolin Steven Soderbergh Magic Mike’s Last Dance

Givvus a sea shanty, Mike.

Oh to be that glass.

Gorgeous fabric TBF.

How is she doing this.

Oi, it’s the London Eye innit!

Immediate favourite character.

A moment for the hat.

Immediately my second favourite character after the roller skater.

Step Up

Where is my Moose cameo?

GET HIM.

Magic Mike’s Last Dance

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is a camp icon. Oh, and guess what? The film’s leading lady is none other than herself! What did we do to deserve this blessing. According to Warner Bros, the flick will reunite the creative team from the OG . As well as Mr Tatum, that includes writer and director . We thank them for their service. The plot of the film — and yes, the plot is essential — sounds pretty juicy too. We meet Mike broke AF and bartending in Florida thanks to a business deal which went wrong. He meets Salma Hayek’s bougie socialiate who flies him off to London with “an offer he can’t refuse… and an agenda all her own”. Right, I’m hooked. The trailer for  is giving everything. It’s giving Channing Tatum. It’s giving Salma Hayek. It’s giving dancing montages. It’s giving sensual stripping scenes. And so, as a lesbian who simply must stan Magical Michael, I decided to break down the trailer for your viewing please. It is quite simply excellent. We start, as all good films must, with a jet boat. And of course, Salma Hayek in a stunning pink jumpsuit looking sad. Channing Tatum pensively dragging a dining room table chair across the floor, placing it in front of the massive window in Salma Hayek’s mansion and then giving her an incredibly serious strip tease. Salma Hayek straddling Channing Tatum backwards, a move which I think would give me a hernia should I ever attempt it. Is Salma Hayek sugar-mommying Channing Tatum? I don’t know, but suddenly she’s flying him to London and he’s telling some geezer on the phone that he’s going to “put on a show at this famous theatre”. We have rehearsal scenes! We have Salma Hayek in a hat! We have Channing Tatum presumably being given a shovel talk by Salma Hayek’s teenage daughter. Channing Tatum says that no one has ever believed in him like Salma Hayek. God, I cannot wait for this fucking movie. In some real  areas, there will be at least one rain-based stripping show. YESSSSS. We see Salma dressed in an excellent coat shouting at an old man that he’s “not shutting [her] down, not this time!”. I’m sensing drama, I’m sensing romance, I’m sensing water-based routines set to get every heart a-pumping. You can best believe I already have my tickets booked and will be watching this with a glass of champagne firmly in hand. Take a gander at the full trailer below: will be sensually shimmying into cinemas on February 9. I’ll be waiting with an extra large frozen Coke.