Get all your news in one place.
100’s of premium titles.
One app.
Start reading
The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Lifestyle
Letters

The three things that you need to make a relationship work

A couple enjoying time together on a beach.
A couple enjoying time together on a beach. Photograph: Dougal Waters/Getty Images

As I will have been married for 48 years next month, I was interested to read Elena Ferrante’s piece (Is there a formula for a lasting relationship? A friend, married for 48 years, says so, Weekend, 22 September). However, I didn’t recognise any of her friend’s formula in my happy relationship.

There are three things you need to make a relationship work. You have to: (1) like each other (passion is not enough, you need to enjoy each other’s company); (2) respect each other’s views and values (and having similar ones means less argument but more respect); and, most importantly, (3) have the same sense of humour (when life hits rock bottom, and it will, you’ll need to laugh).

And as my husband maintains that we both have the ability to laugh at him, all is well.
Sue Lister
Whitnash, Warwickshire

• Join the debate – email guardian.letters@theguardian.com

• Read more Guardian letters – click here to visit gu.com/letters

• Do you have a photo you’d like to share with Guardian readers? Click here to upload it and we’ll publish the best submissions in the letters spread of our print edition

Sign up to read this article
Read news from 100’s of titles, curated specifically for you.
Already a member? Sign in here
Related Stories
Top stories on inkl right now
One subscription that gives you access to news from hundreds of sites
Already a member? Sign in here
Our Picks
Fourteen days free
Download the app
One app. One membership.
100+ trusted global sources.