Book a babysitter. Ask friends, family, a professional to come and sit for a few hours while you get out of the house and enjoy some “couple” time. It could be a walk, cinema, dinner, drink at the local pub… just get out and about for a few hours without baby to chat and relax – the key to getting intimate again.
Ban all talk of babies or other children. Reconnect with the pre-baby you and choose topics that are of mutual interest such as holiday ideas, future plans, topical news, and how each of you is feeling. A mental break from being “mum” or “dad” helps you to feel more “you” – and more desirable.
Dress up! Get out of your baggy tracksuit bottoms and old T-shirt. Getting spruced up will make you feel so much better, more positive and most definitely more attractive and desirable – this goes for both of you.
Have a cuddle. Physical contact in any way is a really good start to getting back to your sexual best. Instead of feeling as though you have to jump into bed straight away, remove any pressure or anxieties by enjoying skin-on-skin cuddling, kissing, or even gentle foreplay, if you’re in the mood.
Talk through any fears. You may be feeling anxious about having sex after having the baby. Women can worry it may be painful, and guys are concerned they don’t want to hurt their partner. Keep the talking positive. Once stresses have been released through sharing, you’ll find the physical stuff is easier and more enjoyable.
• Breaking Mum And Dad: An Insider’s Guide To Parental Anxiety, by Anna Williamson, is published by Green Tree
