The search for the next England manager

John Barry has revealed Brian Barwick's top secret method for choosing the next boss. Photograph: x

"The lengths I have to go to to avoid being lumbered with this job," mutters Martin O'Neill after emerging from his canoe to appear in Colin Hill's effort. Photograph: x

Alan Neill reveals that Brian Barwick isn't the only powerful tool the FA have turned to in their hunt for a new manager. Photograph: x

It's Fabio Capello - dressed as Tommy Cooper! What's not to like about Tim Daly's entry? Photograph: x

"He who wishes to cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three," cackles Phil Burns. "What is your name? What is your quest? And Whaaaaaaat... is your preferred midfield line-up?" Photograph: x

Ross Snell's entry already has a lengthy chunk of text on the picture. Were you really expecting us to include his epic caption too? Photograph: x

"Brian still couldn't decide which one he liked the best," parps Edward Egerton. "Maybe Graham would give him a quick reminder?" Photograph: x

"The FA have promised to throw all their resources into finding the right man," honks Matt Clark. "Right down to the Kitchener sink!" Photograph: x

Neil Pollock reckons that even Barwick's efforts at chivalry fall flat nowadays. Photograph: x

Reuben Duffy doesn't like the new manager's chances of long-term survival. Photograph: x

"The annual running of the prospective England coaches got off to a flyer," sniggers Christopher Reed. Photograph: x

Michael McGrath is searching for a true epic hero to revive England's fortunes. "OK then, we’re after a proven gladiator to transform a talentless rabble into a world beating force," he chortles. "Then, just as you think you’ve finally got the whole nation behind you, everything will end suddenly in a crushing defeat to a far superior foe. At that point, we’ll crucify you. Any volunteers?” Photograph: x

Some things are too obvious to pass up. Joseph Duca does the honours. Photograph: x

Tom Leonard appears to think Dennis Wise is still in with a shout. Photograph: x

"Oi, over here, I'm English," bellows Harry Redknapp, trying to distract the Barwick rider from his cowering quarry in Adrian Moore's effort. Photograph: x